A World Without You
by AKJ4
Summary: A 'The Royal' fic set soon after Jill and Gordon married. Things take a sinister turn when Jill is visited by a police officer.
1. Chapter 1

"Keep still please James." She said gently, holding the syringe in one hand and the young lad's arm in her other. The young lad in question was sobbing loudly, and doing anything but keeping still.

"I don't want an injection!" He continued sobbing, trying to wrench away.

"I know. But it'll only take a second, then it'll be over." She continued trying to sooth the distressed boy, wondering whether she could just inject him now whilst he was concentrating on escaping her and not on the syringe.

"Noooooo!" He screamed, the sound ringing in the doctor's ears long after it had been uttered. He twisted violently, kicking her leg in the process. She let out a gasp of pain, momentarily loosing her grip on James' arm, giving him enough time to wrench himself free, launch himself from the chair, and he was off out the door.

"James!" She half ran, half limped after him, seeing him running down the corridor in the direction of Milner Ward as fast as his little legs could carry him. "James!" She called again with no response, wondering where on Earth his mother was.

"Problem?" The sound of her husband's voice reached her, but she didn't stop, making him in turn run after her, receiving many a strange glance from other occupants of the corridor.

"I just need to catch this boy." She gasped, turning left just before Milner and beginning to ascend the stairs. "He doesn't like the idea of a vaccination."

"Ahhh." Her husband's breathing too was becoming laboured. "Anything I can do?"

"No, not really." She gasped, dodging round a nurse laden with bedpans, hoping her husband too would be as lucky. "I'll see you at home!"

"Okay love!"

She gave no reply as she turned yet another corner, nearly upsetting a trolley of instruments and darting nimbly around a bewildered Sister Brigid. She couldn't help but smile at how the charade must look to the rest of the staff, patients and anyone else who had the misfortune to be in her path. The joys of general practice!

* * *

Jill drew up outside her home, their home. She paused for a moment, looking up at it, taking in the view. Two months they had been living here, one month of that as a married couple. Her gaze turned from their home to her hand, moving it to make the moonlight glint off the gold band adorning her finger. She couldn't imagine ever getting used to it sitting there, a symbol of the three people who made her life complete; her husband and his two children. She practically leapt out her mini at that point, the thought of spending another second away from them near enough unbearable.

She entered the house, pausing to remove her coat and shoes, placing them along with her bags in the places they now belonged. It was one of the many things she marvelled at; at quickly and easily they'd slipped into a routine together, how everything had its place. She padded in her stockinged feet across the plush carpet, her toes sinking ever so slightly into the fibres, remembering the day they'd spent traipsing round the high street, trying to find suitable carpets for each room. It had taken nearly the whole Sunday but the four of them had enjoyed it immensely.

She entered their living room, her gaze immediately drawn to the figure seated on the settee; her husband. She couldn't prevent her lips curving into a smile at the sight of him, still she couldn't believe she had a family to come home to. He turned, meeting her gaze and returning her smile.

"You look happy."

"Just glad to be home." She replied, her smile widening as she took the hand he offered, and releasing an uncharacteristic giggle as he pulled her to sit next to him.

"How was it?" He asked, referring to the labour she'd had to attend, the reason for her late arrival home.

"It was fine. No complications thankfully." She snuggled further into his arms, resting her head against his shoulder.

"What about the boy?"

"Ah well." She smiled, recalling the chase. "I finally managed to catch up with him and got him back to my office. It took two nurses to hold him down, and even then I got kicked another few times. It was all accidental though, I think, the poor boy was absolutely petrified."

"Well where was his mother?"

"Outside. Her youngest was a little grumpy, to say the least. Let's just say my hearing hasn't recovered yet."

He chuckled, tightening his arm around her. After a few moments contented silence, he spoke again. "You know, I was thinking, we should have a party."

"Oh?" She tipped her head back against his arm so she could look at him. "Any particular reason?"

"Well, we've been here two months and no one's really seen the place. And we didn't get a wedding reception either. It'll be a nice opportunity to get our friends together."

She nodded, smiling and placing her lips on his for a quick kiss. "Sounds wonderful. When?"

"I was thinking this Friday. Since I'm taking the kids down to Bournemouth the next day, it might tire them out and make them sleep during journey."

"You wish." She laughed, elbowing him lightly in his side, before her tone turned wistful. "I'm going to miss you, you know."

It was Tom and Katie's half term holiday the next week, and Gordon was taking them down to stay with their grandparents in Bournemouth on Saturday morning. He was to return to Elsinby Monday morning, then drive the long distance back down to collect the children the following Saturday.

"I'm only going for a weekend." He replied to her last uttered sentiment.

"I know, but still..." She shrugged, shifting still closer to him, sliding her arm across him, bringing them closer together. It was hard to believe that she, the ever independent, seemingly emotionally detached Doctor Weatherill was the same woman declaring she'd miss a man who would be gone only for a weekend.

"Well if it's any consolation Mrs Ormerod, I'll miss you too."

She grinned at his words shifting so she bring her face level with his, but still pressing her body close to his. "We'll just have to make the most of the time we've got left then." She whispered, before moving in for what was to be far from a quick kiss.

* * *

"Morning Lizzie." Jill said, smiling as she moved to stand in front of the reception desk, joined moments later by Gordon.

"Morning doctors." She sighed. "Here's your letters, notes and patient lists." She sighed again, only a tiny smile flickering on her features, though the doctors could tell even this was forced.

They accepted their paperwork, smiling sympathetically at the young woman, and made their way towards Jill's office. "Poor Lizzie." She said, placing her notes in the hand Gordon offered, allowing her to unlock her door. They entered, Gordon moving to her desk, placing her notes down as she closed the door.

"Maybe the party will help take her mind off it." He offered, turning and leaning against her desk, holding out a hand into which she placed her own.

"Maybe." She was quite a moment, allowing Gordon to pull her against him and into a hug. "If I ever see that Dave again... He'll get a piece of my mind! How dare he treat Lizzie like that?"

"And I'd love to see that." He chuckled a little, his exhalation moving the loose strands of hair hanging in a soft curl just in front of her ear. "But I doubt Lizzie will appreciate it, no matter how much he's hurt her."

"No, I suppose not." She sighed sadly, not even being able to comprehend the pain Lizzie must be feeling at her husband's betrayal. She tightened her arms around her own husband, laying her head on his shoulder. "You know, it's made me appreciate what I've got, Gordon Ormerod."

"And me." He hugged her closer in response to the increase in pressure of her hands on his back. "But you needn't worry Jill, I'll never betray you."

"Not if you know what's good for you!" She laughed, but happier all the same to receive extra confirmation to what she already knew.

* * *

"Hey." She smiled at him, placing her hand briefly on his arm as she passed him on her way to the filing cabinet.

He looked at her from his position sat at the table behind reception. "Cup of tea?"

"Please." She sighed, placing her files in the cabinet before sinking down in a chair beside him. She sighed again, placing her head in her hands, allowing her heavy eyelids to close. It was late Wednesday afternoon, the day had been busy, for her starting at 5 o'clock that morning with a labour.

"You okay?" She felt him place a hand on her back, the warmth transferring through the thin material of her blouse.

"Yeah, just a little tired is all." She smiled a little as Gordon rubbed her back soothingly.

"Doctor Weatherill."  
Jill almost groaned out loud when Lizzie called her name, knowing it meant more work. "Yes Lizzie?" She sighed, raising her head and turning to see Lizzie with the phone in her hand.

"I know Doctor Goodwin's on call this evening but it's Mrs Holloway. She said she had a fall this morning, and will only have you." She paused, looking worried. "What shall I tell her?"

"It's fine, Lizzie. Tell her I'm on my way." As Lizzie turned back to relate the message, Jill stood up, pausing only when Gordon took hold of her wrist.

"But you were out early this morning, and back late last night, and the night before!"

"Yes, I do know Gordon." She said dryly, rolling her eyes. "I'll see you later." She bent down to kiss his cheek, before walking out. She straightened her back, taking a deep breath, forcing herself to wake herself up properly. She knew it was going to be a long night.

* * *

"What are you thinking?" She whispered, looking up at him. They were in bed, Gordon gazing down at her, his arm beneath her head. He was laying on his side, propped up by an elbow, holding her close to him with his free hand on her waist. He trailed his hand up her body to her cheek, brushing back her hair.

"About our wedding day." He gazed down at her, matching her smile as she remembered the day. "I never did tell you how beautiful you looked in your dress did I."

Her smile widened and she blushed, hoping he wouldn't be able to see in the dim light.

"And you looked pretty dapper yourself. Especially after you got all sooty."

"Really? I'll remember that next time we go out; a bit of dirt to complete the outfit."

She laughed, shifting and snuggling closer against him. "You definitely looked better than I did."

"Oh I don't know, you certainly looked a sight." She raised an eyebrow at the comment. "Dressed in a wedding dress, scrubs, covered in soot and treating patients, I don't think the hospital's seen anything quite like it."

She hit him lightly. "If I knew you were going to be horrible I wouldn't have complimented you."

He grinned at her, barely stopping himself from laughing. "You did look a sight... But you also looked very cute."

She raised her eyebrow again, about to contest his choice of word, but despite herself, she yawned.

"I'm sorry, am I boring you?" He asked, pretending to be affronted.

"No, no, just a little tired." She yawned again, doing nothing to try and hide it.

"Exhausted more like. You've had a busy few days."

It was true; she'd had numerous late nights and early mornings, accompanied with draining operations and labours.

"Why don't you try and get some sleep." He continued, running a hand through her hair.

"Mmm. That would be nice." She murmured, already starting to drift off.

He shifted onto his back, allowing her to lay her head upon his shoulder. His arm wrapped around her, holding her securely against him.

"You know," she suddenly said, yawning again. "I don't think many people can say an explosion is part of the happiest day of their lives." She grinned up at him, feeling the vibrations of his chuckle through the hand placed against his chest.

"No, I don't suppose they can." His thumb glided across her cheek, his fingertips moving to brush through her hair. She smiled at the sensation, her eyes slowly closing as sleep took over.


	2. Chapter 2

"Gordon, remember; snacks and alcohol in the cupboard; quiches, dips, salad, soft drinks in the fridge; vol-au-vents and pie in the freezer." She paused, in her mad dash around the kitchen to glare at him as he smirked at her.

"I did help buy them, prepare them, and store them." He said, trying hard not to laugh at his wife's frenzied cleaning of the kitchen, whilst simultaneously attempting to help Tom prepare his breakfast.

"Gordon." She pointed the cereal box at him. "I'm only making sure, just in case I'm stuck at the hospital." She shook the box, as if to emphasize her words, only serving to send some cereal spilling to the floor. She sighed heavily, immediately dropping down onto her hands and knees with a thud, beginning to pick each piece up.

Gordon walked round to her, crouching down behind her, reaching round and gently taking hold of her wrists, halting her movements. "Relax Jill. Why's this bothering you so much?"

She sighed again, but allowed herself a moment to pause, leaning back into Gordon's embrace. "It's just... this is the first of time we've done something like this, I just want people to enjoy themselves. I want it to be perfect."

"It will be." He kissed her cheek. "People are coming for a party, not to scrutinise every speck of dust in our home."

"I suppose not." She conceded, allowing Gordon to lift her to her feet as he stood. She couldn't help a smile tug at the corners of her mouth as she thought over his words, the last two in particular; 'our home'. She still sometimes couldn't believe everything that had happened with their relationship.

"Sit." He voice interrupted her thoughts. He gently pushed her down onto a chair and handed her the cereal box. "Now eat your breakfast else we'll be late."

"Yes Dad." She mocked, grinning at him as he merely raised an eyebrow at her, turning to pour Tom's milk for him instead of retaliating.

The grin stayed as she surveyed her _family_, the word still sending a thrill through her. She didn't care if the party was perfect; what people thought of their home wasn't what was important. Times like this were the important things, and if they had many more times like this, that would be perfect.

* * *

She snuggled up to him, her hand resting upon his chest, feeling the warmth through the soft cotton of his shirt. His arm lay relaxed across her shoulder, his thumb stroking the top of her arm. She closed her eyes, sighing contentedly, allowing herself to relax though knowing very soon they'd be interrupted, the guests would soon start to arrive, and Katie and Tom were playing hyperactively in the garden, incredibly excited about the party.

Jill and Gordon had both- with some luck, and much dodging of Lizzie- managed to arrive home on time, giving them enough time to prepare for the party, and even ten minutes to relax together. Although this appeared to be a bad idea as the hectic week caught up with her.

"Jill..." He murmured, his free hand coming up to brush her hair from her face.

"Mmmm."

"Don't go to sleep."

"But I'm tired." She moaned, sliding down a little in her seat, tucking her head under his chin.

"People will start arriving soon." And sure enough, as the words left his mouth, the doorbell rang, causing Jill to release a groan and Gordon to chuckle.

"Ignore them."

Gordon laughed again, changing his hold on her, easing her off him to sit up, despite the resistance she put up. He stood up, bending to press a kiss to her head before winking at her and leaving the room. She heard the sunshine voice of Lizzie as Gordon opened the door, and she yawned and stretched, standing up and following the path her husband had taken.

"Hello Doctor Weatherill!"

"Hello Lizzie." She smiled, leading her out into the garden where Tom and Katie immediately pounced on her. Jill stood back watching the scene, glad the receptionist appeared happier. More guests entered the garden then; Alun, Samantha and Meryl, with Gordon right behind them carrying a tray of food. They shared a smile before the doorbell rang again, Jill going to answer it.

It wasn't long before the garden was full of guests, mostly consisting of hospital staff. Alun seemed to be in charge of the music, and stood next to the record player, flicking through her own and Gordon's records. Tables laden with food were placed along the perimeter of the garden, and guests drifted from them to the benches and chairs dotted around, or just stood in groups chatting. Katie and Tom darted between the staff, happily receiving the attention paid to them.

Gordon came to stand behind her, sliding his arms around her and resting his chin on her shoulder, his head resting against hers. She rested her arms over his, covering his hands with her own.

"Perfect?" He questioned quietly into her ear.

"Perfect." She echoed, leaning back against him.

* * *

She was still settled against him when a commotion to their right caught her eye. Samantha and Alun stood, supporting Lizzie between them. Samantha was uttering desperate words to Lizzie, though Jill couldn't make them out, but she could see that the receptionist appeared to be hyperventilating. "Gordon." She uttered, pointing in their direction, already moving from his arms.

She crossed swiftly to the group, taking Alun's place, and together with Samantha, practically carried Lizzie to sit in one of the white iron garden chairs. She sat opposite, taking Lizzie's wrist and checking her pulse. "Just focus on you breathing Lizzie. Try and slow it... That's it, good girl." She broke her gaze from Lizzie momentarily to glance at Samantha.

The response she received was murmured softly, so she was the only recipient. "She overheard Alun. Dave, her husband, has gone and got another woman pregnant."

She sighed, poor Lizzie, she thought, it seemed she was finally getting over it only to be hit with more news.

"Lizzie! What's wrong? What's happened?"

Jill sighed again as Ken rushed to his daughter's side, and Lizzie recounted the news through gulping breaths.

"Water Lizzie. Just sip it slowly okay." Gordon joined the group and placed a tumbler of water in Lizzie's trembling hand. He straightened up, stepping to stand beside Jill and rest a hand on her shoulder.

Lizzie became calmer, but the upset was still there. Jill began to become quite concerned with some of this things Lizzie was saying about herself, things she wholly believed to be a product of the male dominated society. And it wasn't helped by Ken chipping in his take on the situation. "Who's going to want me now I've been dumped and divorced?" She finally cried, prompting Jill to take action. She took Lizzie's hand and stood up, glancing at Meryl and Samantha, tilting her head, indicating they should follow. She lead them to a table in a corner of the garden, underneath the blossoming apple tree, sufficiently secluded so as to provide them with some privacy.

Once they were all seated, Jill spoke. "Lizzie, you don't have to be defined by your relationships with a man. You're Lizzie in your own right, and you are the only person that matters from now on, okay."

"You will survive on your own, I promise you." Samantha was the next to speak. "Remember Lizzie, a woman need a man-"

"Like a fish needs a bicycle." Jill joined in. "Here, here!" She toasted the statement with Samantha, but one glance at Lizzie told her their words hadn't worked, confusion had now joined the upset. "Lizzie." She sighed, taking her hand, forcing her to look at her and absorb her words. "I know it's going to be hard, but you'll get through it. I think you're stronger than you give yourself credit for. And look, don't listen to your father, if you want to stay in your house, there are ways. You could take in lodgers."

"Really?"

She nodded, pleased Lizzie looked a little brighter. "Yes. You're fully capable of supporting yourself. You don't need a man for all that. My advice is, get your finances settled, then enjoy being single! Concentrate on yourself, do what you want to do."

Lizzie nodded. "Thank you doctor."

Jill shrugged, rising from her seat. "Come see me before you go, I'll lend you some books you might like to read."

Lizzie thanked her again, and Jill smiled her acknowledgement before wandering off to find Gordon. Lizzie's situation had once again made Jill realise just how lucky she was. She did need Gordon, just not in the same way Lizzie had been suggesting; it wasn't a need born out of dependency, it was just... a need to be with the man she loved, she supposed.

* * *

"Here you are Lizzie. Some bedtime reading." Jill placed a large stack of books onto the small garden table in front of the receptionist, smiling at her bewildered gaze. "Don't worry, I'm not going to test you. Just if you want them. They might help a little."

"Thank you doctor." She gathered the books in her arms and followed Samantha out the garden.

Jill glanced around the garden, devoid of guests, but full of dirty glasses. She let out a sigh and was about to make a start when Gordon whispered in her ear, making her jump.

"Recruiting her to the sisterhood were you?"

"Ha ha." She said sarcastically, scowling at his slightly mocking tone.

He grinned, taking her elbow and turning her to face him properly. "Perfect?" He questioned, echoing their earlier conversations.

"Well, apart from poor Lizzie's news." She sighed.

"Yes, well, it's never easy is it, falling out of love."

"Well I hope I never have to find that out." She replied.

"Well you won't, not if I've got anything to do with it." His voice was low, his eyes sincere, and she reflected again just how lucky she was.

"Right, well, talking about sexual equality, how about giving me a hand with these glasses?" She turned, but he took her hand, pulling back to face him.

"And how about we leave these 'till the morning." He took hold of her other hand, pulling her closer to him. "After all, we have a whole weekend apart to make up for."

She smiled, moving her arms around him and kissing him, deepening it as he slid his hands over her to her press against her back.

She had, unwittingly, received the short end of the straw, she reflected later as she lay in bed in her husbands arms. After all, he was to leave early in the morning, and she was going to left with all the glasses herself. But, after the previous couple of hours 'making up' for a weekend apart, she could safely say she'd wash a hundred glasses if that was to be her reward.


	3. Chapter 3

"Jill, where's my doll?"

"Jill, where's my blue car?"

"Jill, where's Katie's swimming certificate?"

Jill just stared at the three Ormerods as they converged on her in the hallway, firing question after question at her. "Why on Earth didn't any of you pack last night, like I told you to?"

"Erm..." Gordon mumbled, the three of them looked away, wearing identical sheepish expressions.

She rolled her eyes and sighed, but had to fight to stop from smiling at them. "Katie, your doll is in the kitchen. Tom, your car is in the bathroom, strangely, and Gordon, Katie's certificate is on the coffee table."

"Thank you Jill!" They all called before dashing off to their respective room. She rolled her eyes again and laughed softly at the retreating backs of her family. Jill too left the hallway, walking through the kitchen and out the back door, giving Katie a quick hug on the way. She sighed as she surveyed all the glasses she still had to collect and wash. She took a step towards the nearest table, but it seemed the glasses would have to wait a little longer as a pair of arms snaked around her waist, halting her movements.

"I packed last night, you saw me."

"Yeah, a shirt and jacket." She replied, feigning annoyance, but leaning back against her husband's chest.

He tightened his arms around her, resting his chin on her shoulder and kissing her cheek. "I'm going to miss you."

"I know. Me too." She turned in his arms, looping her around his neck. "I can't remember the last time we spent so long apart."

"Me neither. I don't think two days have ever seemed like such a long time!"

* * *

Jill settled into a dining chair, placing the plate of steaming food in front of her. She flicked through the medical journal in front of her, stopping at a particularly interesting article she'd been reading to read all week.

Gordon and the children had finally, after much delay, left at midday. Gordon's wish that the children sleep during the majority of the journey seemed destined not to come true from the outset, judging from the incredible excitableness of Tom and Katie. They'd at least two hours before they departed running around the house and repeatedly screaming 'We're going to visit Granddad and Grandma, and Grandpa!", until Jill and Gordon had grabbed one child each, and separated them. She could only imagine the state of Gordon's eardrums if the whole journey were to continue along the same line.

Jill on the other hand had enjoyed a relatively peaceful afternoon. She'd gone to The Royal just for wards rounds, passing with little complication, and then headed home, eventually getting round to washing the 30 or so glasses from the party. Afterwards, she'd prepared dinner, then settled down to eat it, finding for the first time in ages enough peace and quiet to read her journal. She planned to read some more, then have a well deserved early night. There was of course the possibility of an emergency since she was on call, but she hoped for once, the whole of Elsinby would be an accident-free, illness-free town.

But before bed, there was of course the anticipated phone call from Gordon. Despite the peace and quiet, she knew she missed him and the children already.

* * *

The house was quiet, unusually quiet. Despite living with Gordon, Katie and Tom for just two months, already Jill had gotten used to the normal bustle and almost constant noise that filled their house. Now, settled into the corner of the settee, the house devoid of its other occupants, Jill couldn't help but miss all that noise. Even the air felt stiller, stale almost, as if it needed some activity. She marvelled at how quickly she'd become accustomed to her new family, how imagining herself living alone was now such a strange concept.

She couldn't wait for Gordon's return the next day. He'd phone the evening before, informing her they'd arrived safely. She'd spoken briefly to Katie and Tom, both equally as excited at seeing their Grandparents. Gordon had then told her that yes, they had been just as hyperactive through the whole journey down. She was just imagining the amusing (and probably not so amusing in Gordon's point of view) scenes that might have taken place through their journey, when the sound of the doorbell rang through the house.

She rose, depositing her book on the coffee table, straightening her clothes, then made her way to the door. She slid the lock open, and pulled back the door to reveal a constable on the doorstep.

"Hello, officer." She said, surprise evident in her voice.

"Good afternoon." He answered politely. "Are you Doctor Weatherill?"

"I am, yes." She replied, confusion still lacing her tone.

"Can I come in?"

"Yes, yes. Of course." She stepped back, allowing him to enter and closing the door behind him. She gestured at the living room and followed him in. "Would you like anything drink?"

"No thank you." He replied. It was only then that she noticed the slight awkwardness in his demeanour, the permanent grimness to his expression. "I have something to tell you. I think it would be best if you sat down."

* * *

The shrill ringing of the telephone startled her into consciousness. For a moment, she hung in blissful confusion as she got her bearings, but inevitably, the devastation penetrated her momentary ignorance, pounding the reality home, breaking her even further than it had done the previous day.

Still the telephone, out in the hallway, continued to make it known that someone was trying to contact her. But she curled up tighter, hugging the cushion to her; a futile attempt at comfort when all she needed was her husband. But it wasn't to be, would never be again. The thought intensified the grief already coursing through her, each second she continued to think of all that would never be again took him further away from her.

She released a sob. Not even the telephone was a enough to drown out the heartbreaking sound. The tears came then, from her red-raw eyes, down her already tear-stained cheeks, settling on the already soaked cushion into which she'd released her emotions the previous evening. Sometime during the night she'd managed to fall asleep, a result of pure emotional exhaustion.

The ringing stopped, the house was once again plunged into silence, but only momentarily. The clock in the hallway filled the void, chiming out the time, signally the passage of another hour in which she'd lived in a world without Gordon.


	4. Chapter 4

"Jill?"

She opened her eyes slowly. With her body still tightly curled up, gripping the cushion, she tipped her head back to look in the direction of the voice, though she recognised it immediately. She let out a gasp as her eyes fell upon the figure in the doorway, confirming her suspicions. "Gordon..." She breathed his name. It was as if the previous day hadn't happened, the constable hadn't told her the life shattering news. There was her husband, standing in the doorway, living, breathing, gazing at her, his eyes holding the same concern she remembered, the special one reserved just for her. And his voice, the way he said her name, the intonation, all exactly the same. She could see the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed, beneath his white shirt and black suit jacket, the same ones she'd seen him fold so neatly in his suitcase on Friday. Her mind couldn't create all that detail, could it?

"Jill? Are you alright? What's happened?" He was advancing towards her, his hand reaching out to touch her.

She leapt up from the settee then, preventing him from reaching her. She backed away until the back of her legs came into contact with the coffee table. She shook her head violently, tears streaming down her face without recognition, wishing him to stop, but still he kept closing the distance between them. Her eyes flicked between him and the doorway, calculating her move. Once he was far enough away from the door, she darted around him, giving him a wide enough berth so as not to touch him, and made her escape for the hallway. She spun around, walking back quickly, almost tripping over herself, stopping only when her back met the wall. She wasn't entirely sure the exact reason for running away. It might have been preventing him from touching her, destroying the illusion she had created; she would know he wasn't really there when she didn't feel his hand, thereby forcing her back into her devastating present and making her confront once again the loss of her husband.

Her gaze was riveted to the doorway, holding her breath, waiting for him to appear once again. It seemed like hours, but was in fact only a few seconds before he once again came within her sight, again, advancing towards her. His eyes held the same concern, but now accompanied by bewilderment.

She shook her head violently again, pressing her back firmly against the wall. "No!" She screamed desperately, sobbing before screaming once again. "No! Please, s-stay away. P-please." Tears continued to stream from her red-raw eyes as her whole body shook, destroying the little composure and strength holding her up, sending her crumbling to the floor. She tears continued, the trembling accompanied by sobs wracking her body, the noise forcing itself painfully from her throat.

"Jill?"

A new voice reached her, a distinctly female, once she immediately recognised. "M-Matron?" She managed to splutter before once again descending into sobs.

"Jill. Whatever is the matter?"

A new figure came within her eyeline, wearing the unmistakable deep blue uniform of Matron. The figure knelt beside her, a hand touched her shoulder. Jill immediately grasped it, she could feel it, the thin skin covering complex bone structure. With her logic, Matron was real, she wasn't a figment of her imagination. "Matron." She whispered, clutching the older woman's hand tightly. "Is he there?"

"Who Jill?"  
"Gordon. Is he really there?" She gazed up at Matron's confused eyes, her own face marred with grief.

"I don't understand."

"Please." She sobbed. "Just tell me."

"Yes, of course he is. Gordon," She redirected her voice. "Come here."

"Jill? What is it sweetheart?"

She stared at her husband through tear-filled eyes as he crouched in front of her. She kept a tight hold on Matron's hand, not daring to touch him, just in case.

"Jill, please. You're scaring me. Talk to me, please." His tone took on a hint of desperation; he glanced to Matron, worry and helplessness written in his expression.

She took a deep breath, trying to gather some strength from somewhere within her, she had to find out either way, she couldn't go on like this. Her right hand still grasped Matron's, but she lifted her left hand towards him, stopping just short of making contact. "Touch me Gordon." She managed to choke out between sobs. "Take my hand, please."

Confusion joined the myriad of emotions on his face, but he reached out his hand towards hers nevertheless. She held her breath; it seemed an age before his fingers finally brushed across hers, moving to curl themselves around her smaller ones. His grip was warm, solid, her hand fitting against his exactly as she remembered. Dizziness engulfed her, her confusion being replaced by confusion of a different kind, but it was replaced quickly as relief swept through her, pushing aside her grief. He was here! Gordon, her husband, was really crouching in front of her holding her hand, not a mere figment of her imagination, an actual solid presence. She exhaled, breathing his name in a rush of air. She moved away from Matron, leaning towards her husband, her free hand clutching tightly onto his shoulder, feeling the muscles through the familiar softness jacket. It took a moment, no doubt due to his confusion she was doing nothing to elevate, but he finally wrapped his arm around her, pulling her closer to him, providing the final contact she so desperately needed. She pressed closer to him, tucking her head beneath his chin, closing her eyes and inhaling deeply, allowing his unique smell to fill her.

She felt him place a kiss in her hair as he eased himself into a sitting position, not releasing her. Once he was settled, he gathered her even closer to him, cradling her against his chest. One hand stroked her back, no doubt in an attempt to sooth her; her tears still fell thick and fast, trembling still had a hold of her body, interrupted by the occasional involuntary shudder of emotion.


	5. Chapter 5

"Here's a nice cup of tea for you both."

"Matron." Jill whispered, surprised; with all the emotions, she had forgotten the other woman's presence in the house.

Sometime whilst they had been huddled in the hallway, Matron had retreated to the kitchen. After Jill had calmed sufficiently, Gordon had managed to help her stand and manoeuvre them into the living room. They sat there now, Jill curled up, holding Gordon tight, whilst his arms encircled her, encasing her against him. She didn't move away from him, just lifted a hand to brush her hair from in front of her face, allowing her to see Matron place two cups of steaming tea on the coffee table in front of them.

"If there's nothing else I'd better be getting back to the hospital."

"Of course Matron." It was Gordon who spoke, Jill not trusting her voice to not to crack. She was embarrassed enough as it was with her show of emotion, without presenting more. "Would you like a lift?"

"No, no. I'll take the bus. You stay where you're needed." She looked down at them, concern evident in her eyes. "Don't worry about coming in today, I'll sort it with Mr Middleditch and Doctor Goodwin. If there's anything else, just give me a ring."

"Thank you Matron."

They were both silent, allowing them to hear Matron's footfalls through the hall, the click of the front door opening, and the bang of it shutting.

She drew in a shuddering breath, releasing it slowly, attempting to control her emotions. She had yet to explain to Gordon, and she could only imagine how worried and confused he must be at the past hour.

She shifted her position, lifting her head from his shoulder and sitting up straighter, feeling his arms loosen to give her room. She was level with him, allowing her to meet his concerned gaze. She attempted a reassuring smile as she brushed the tears from her cheeks, but it did nothing to alleviate the worry from his expression. "I suppose you want to know what happened." She laughed humourlessly, the sound falling flat around them. Gordon merely sighed in response, his hand rubbing her arm in comfort.

She took a deep breath, preparing herself to divulge the reasons, but instead, questioned him. "Why was Matron here with you?"

"I went straight to the hospital; I thought you'd be there. Lizzie was in a state when I arrived, I couldn't get any sense out of her. It was Matron who told me you hadn't turned up, weren't answering the phone. She offered to come with me back here in case something had happened and I needed help."

She nodded, averting her eyes guiltily. "I'm sorry." She whispered tearfully.

"It's alright sweetheart." He murmured, reaching up to stroke her cheek gently, raising her head, forcing her to look at him. "I just want to know what's upset you."

She nodded, her hand reaching up to cover his for a moment, before turning her head and kissing his palm as she readied herself to speak.

* * *

A car accident, he'd said, Gordon... And that was all she heard. The constable's words were muffled as her world crashed down around her. She had no recollection of how she'd ended up in the living room, couldn't even remember the constable, all that remained with her was the absolute devastation that had consumed her at the thought of never seeing Gordon again.

She said this to him, whispering, brokenly, repeating herself, placing no order to her words, she couldn't even be sure if she made any sense, if he understood her at all. But he didn't question her, instead staying silent, tightening his hold on her, his arms enveloping her, holding her close to him.

She couldn't help reliving the moment, couldn't help the tears coursing down her cheeks, almost as fast as before. The only difference was, Gordon was beside her, holding her tightly. She buried her face in the crisp white material of his shirt. She fell silent, drawing a shuddering breath, releasing it against his neck.

"Oh Jill... Sweetheart..." She felt it more than heard it, his lips pressed to her head, each inhalation and exhalation gently moving the strands of dark hair. He stroked her hair, occasionally placing kisses on the top of her head.

After a while, she calmed sufficiently, Gordon's presence serving to sooth her, reminding her that her world hadn't fallen apart.


	6. Chapter 6

"So this man, he told you your husband had died?"

Jill nodded, fighting back the tears the words had evoked. After allow Jill time to compose herself, Gordon had phoned the police. They were gathered in the living room. PCs Younger sat upon the settee next to her, PC Bellamy on the chair to the left, and Gordon sat next to her.

"What was the constable's name?" PC Bellamy asked her gently.

"I don't know, I can't remember." She shook her head, racking her brains, trying to think of something, but all she could remember were the words, repeating themselves again and again, which had brought everything crashing down around her. "I don't know, sorry. I can't remember, I'm sorry."

"Alright." PC Bellamy said soothingly. "It was likely he used a false name anyway. Can you give us description of his appearance, as detailed as you can."

She nodded, lowering her head and closing her eyes, trying desperately to conjure up the image of him standing on her doorstep. "He wasn't too tall, maybe about the same height as Gordon, I think... He had dark hair, black maybe, or brown. Or... it could have been blond." She paused, her voice on the edge of breaking as irritation at herself built up. Each colour she placed to the figure, each description could have been equally as plausible as the next, and all could have been equally as false. The fingers of her left hand clenched into a fist, the nails biting into the soft flesh of her palm, punishing herself for her inability to remember. Her right hand continuously raked over her leg, pain created even through the material of her trousers. Gordon covered it with his own, stilling its movements, his thumb stroking the back of her wrist, trying to impart some comfort.

"It's okay." PC Bellamy finally said, seemingly realising he wasn't to get any information from her. "Can you think of anyone who might want to do this? Anyone with a grudge? Anyone you may have upset."

She shook her head, sagging against Gordon, the situation catching up with her. The thought that anyone might want to do such a thing terrifying. And if they did that, they could easily do something else, something worse- even more terrifying.

"Doctor Ormerod?"

Gordon too shook his head.

"Okay well we'll be on our way. We'll speak to your neighbours; they might have seen something."

She nodded, whispering her thanks, though she couldn't be sure they heard it.

"If you see anything suspicious, or think of anything at all, don't hesitate to contact us. We'll see ourselves out."

As soon as the front door closed, signalling the departure of the constables, Gordon slid his arms around Jill, encasing her protectively against him. She sought shelter in his embrace, holding him tight, not wanting to let go.

She didn't divulge her fear to him, the idea still too new, she hadn't even had time to think about it properly. All she did know was there was someone out there who had wanted to hurt her, someone who might try something else, something that might actually shatter her world permanently.

* * *

He continued to hold her for a while, until a rumbling could be heard. She patted his stomach and tipped her head back to look at him. "Hungry?" She questioned.

"Yes." He admitted. "What about you? Have you had anything to eat today?"

She shook her head, easing herself off him as he made to get up. "I didn't really think."

"I'll make us something. Anything you particularly fancy?"

"Not really..." She paused, watching him for a moment then lowering her eyes. "Would you like some help?"

"Sure." He replied, holding out his hand, which she immediately took. It wasn't strictly necessary, but he could tell she was still shaken up by what had happened, and needed to be near him. He knew he'd feel the same if the roles had been reversed. He shuddered, wondering how he'd have reacted; it didn't bear thinking about. As they passed through the hallway and into the kitchen, he gave her hand a gentle squeeze, relieved to see a tiny smile when he glanced back at her.

They prepared and ate the food in silence, but Jill stuck close to him throughout. She was very quiet, he observed, watching her with concern as she picked at her food. It was more than just quiet though, she appeared withdrawn, her posture deflated, her eyes dull. Her face still bore the marks of her hours of crying; red skin framing her eyes, her cheeks still stained with tears. She was still just shaken, he reasoned, she'd be fine with time.

She leant forward and placed her plate upon the coffee table, the sandwich only half eaten. He placed his empty plate next to it, deciding to leave hers there in case she felt hungry later. He picked up Jill's medical journal, lying open in the middle of an article he guessed she'd been reading. He chose a book for himself then settled back against the settee, handing the journal to Jill. She smiled her thanks and snuggled up next to him as he looped an arm around her. Her head rested against his shoulder in a position that allowed him to lay his cheek up on it. Her dark hair was soft against his skin, her light scent filling his senses as he inhaled.

After a while he felt her weight against him increase, though not uncomfortably so. Her breathing had slowed and deepened and the hand holding the journal now lay across his lap. He gently eased the papers from her fingers and placed it upon the settee behind her. He tightened his hold on her, her ribcage rising and falling beneath her arm as his hand rested upon her stomach.

He placed a gentle kiss into her hair. She needed the sleep, he knew. He hoped she'd feel better for it, and when she awoke he'd be once again be greeted with her beautiful smile and shining eyes.


	7. Chapter 7

"Are you sure you're ready to go back today?" Gordon stopped her just as they were to enter the hospital.

"What else can I do Gordon, eh? Sit at home all day, running through everything in my head?"

"Fair point." He replied. He gazed at her in sympathy as she raised a hand to her mouth attempting to stifle a yawn. She'd spent a restless night. In retrospect, the sleep during the day probably did more bad for her than good. Though she'd tried to avoid waking Gordon, twice he roused. He then proceeded to sleepily encase her in his arms, murmuring often incoherent phrases to her in an attempt to sooth her into slumber once more. Jill yawned once again, smiling sheepishly at Gordon, before leading the way inside.

"Morning doctors." Lizzie greeted them, in a tone, though more cheerful than the previous week, was still far from the usual sunshine tone staff and patients were accustomed to.

"Morning Liz-" Gordon began but stopped. The change in the receptionists appearance momentarily shocking him. In front of him was a Lizzie dressed like he never seen her before. She was dressed in a heavy, grey woollen sweater, and a glance over the reception desk revealed grey trousers and shoes. It wasn't so much what she was wearing that caused the surprise though, it was more the stark contrast to the normal bright print dresses and mini skirts, accompanied by overly high heeled shoes. "What-" He began, but once again stopped abruptly, this time by a tap on his arm from Jill. A glance to his left saw her shaking her head at him. Seeing this, he immediately stopped any questions he was about to ask, and merely thanked Lizzie as he accepted the post and patient lists she handed him.

In Jill's office, Gordon watched her for a moment, placing her papers on her desk, before questioning her. "What was all that with Lizzie?"

"Ah, yes." She turned, perched on her desk and crossed her arms. "I forgot all about that. She was dressed like that on Saturday. It seems she's been reading those books I gave her."

"Ah." Gordon responded, a smile creeping onto his face, but it quickly vanished as Jill raised an eyebrow at him.

"Surely this is better than her pining after Dave. She's getting her self-confidence back, learning to respect herself. However, Ken and Alun aren't too pleased. I don't think I'm in their good books at the moment."

Gordon merely nodded, too afraid to say anything in case it would be taken the wrong way as Jill gazed steadily at him. "Anyway." He eventually said brightly, hoping to change the subject. "Must get on, patients to see and all that."

Jill nodded, stepping forwards and surprising him with a tight hug. He laughed softly at her show of affection and slid his arms around her, gliding one hand up and down her back, feeling his wife's familiar form through the soft material of her coat. "You going to be okay?"

She nodded, releasing him and smiling broadly at him. It remained as he walked out the door, waving to her before shutting it behind him. Immediately, the smile slipped away and despite herself, a slight trembling took hold of her.

* * *

"Goodbye Mr Finch." Jill smiled, following her last patient of morning surgery out into the corridor. She entered the area behind reception, handing her file to Lizzie. "Has Doctor Ormerod finished?" She questioned, opening the lid of the kettle, checking the amount of water inside.

"He finished ages ago. Doing his house call now."

"Oh really." She replied, flicking the switch on the kettle. She fished out some tea bags from the caddy, concentrating on the act of tea making and trying to ignore the panicky feeling building within her. "Where abouts?"

"Erm." Lizzie pushed aside some papers on her desk, lifted a couple of files before coming across the information she needed. "He's only got one. The patient's on Hessel Road. It's the one by the hairdressers in town. You know, the one painted bright red. The hairdressers I mean, not the road..." She trailed off, laughing slightly.

Jill merely nodded, trying to make her next question sound as nonchalant as possible. "Did he say how long he'd be?"

"He should be back anytime now I expect." She smiled, turning to a woman with a child at her desk.

The whistle of the kettle broke into Jill's thoughts, and she picked it up, forcing her hands to steady as she poured it into two patterned cups upon the table in front of her. "Hello love!" She almost dropped the kettle as her husband's voice reached her ears. She let out a sigh, relief rushing through her. She plastered a smile on her face and turned to him.

"Tea? I think there's enough water left."

"Please." He replied, flashing her one of his smiles reserved just for her.

She once again concentrated on making tea, using it as an excuse not to talk. She couldn't trust her voice, not until she'd completely calmed down. Wordlessly, she handed him his steaming cup, then placed one in front of Lizzie, smiling as she thanked her. Gordon had already picked up her tea when she turned back, and gestured with his head to his office. She followed him in and closed the door behind them, satisfied she had calmed sufficiently to conduct herself as normal around him.

They drank their tea in silence, comfortable to be in one another's presence without filling every second with conversation. Gordon seemed deep in thought, while she herself mulled over her reaction just a few minutes previously. She couldn't deny it was fear that had gripped her at hearing Gordon was out of the hospital, despite housecalls being something they did every day and had done ever since they'd started. She knew her reaction was due to the possibility of the unknown danger. Someone had deliberately set out to hurt her, emotionally, and there was no knowing if he or she would stop at just telling her what they had, or whether that was a threat, and the worst was yet to come.

"Jill. Jill?"

She broke from her thoughts when she felt Gordon place his hand upon hers. "Mmm?" She looked up at him, blinking, clearing her vision of the blurriness staring at one place for a length of time had caused.

"I've been saying your name at least ten times. Where were you? Somewhere good I hope." His expression was filled with amusement, his tone gently mocking, but not unkindly so.

"Yeah, something like that." She murmured, forcing her expression to remain bright as he continued speaking.

"I've been thinking, since there's no evening surgery today, and Jeff's on call, how's about we get out of here early and go to the beach?"

"Well I'd love to, but shouldn't we be covering for Jeff. We did leave him on his own yesterday."

"I asked him, but he said he'd rather I cover next week. He's got his eye on someone I think."

She returned the knowing smile he flashed at her, then nodded. "Then we shall go to the beach. Meet at five?"

He nodded, grinned and kissed her on the cheek. "See you then." He replied before heading out towards the wards.


	8. Chapter 8

"All finished?"

Jill jumped as her husband sidled up beside her, wrapping a firm around her waist and pulling her to him. She stepped away from him, shooting him a look which told him he should know better. He merely grinned in response as he watched her straighten her blouse and glance around reception, making sure no one had seen. "Yes, I am." She finally replied, with deliberate professionalism, both as a way to chide him for his show of affection, and for Lizzie's benefit who had witnessed the exchange.

"Good." He held out his hand to her, which she took, leading her out of reception, wishing Lizzie goodnight on the way. It was funny, holding hands was something she didn't mind, neither was a kiss to the cheek, everything else was too much for the prying eyes of the hospital. Gordon knew all this of course, but just occasionally, he liked to overstep the mark, just to see how she'd react.

She took a step towards the car park, but he tugged her in the opposite direction. "It's a nice evening, let's walk."

She nodded, tightening her hold on his hand, and moving closer to him, curling the fingers of her free hand round his wrist.

He was right, it was a lovely night; the sky was clear, the area still bathed in sunlight, but not so intense to be uncomfortable. The wind was gentle, refreshing. She broke her contact from Gordon briefly to free her hair from its ponytail, allowing the breeze to lift a few strands. Gordon paused, placing a kiss to the top of her head, before sliding an arm around her waist. This time she didn't pull away.

She was glad he'd suggested a walk. The weather made it pleasurable, but most of all they were allowed peaceful time together. The previous weeks had been busy; late nights, early mornings. And then of course there had been the fake policeman and his lies, and her subsequent reaction. Now, they could stroll leisurely, chatting or in comfortable silence. They stopped at a fish and chip shop, then made their way down to the beach, sitting on the sand in front of the sea wall, eating from their newspaper packages.

"I'm not sure how good this is for our health." Jill mused, holding up her empty newspaper. "I hate to think of the chemicals they use in the ink. And then all that grease and salt..."

"Lovely Jill." He said sarcastically, plucking the paper from her fingers, standing up and making the short journey to the bin before returning. He settled once more beside her, encasing her in his arms, in a much needed hug. For all the peacefulness, she was still nervous, always on guard, her eyes darting around, looking for anything unusual or suspicious.

They proceeded into a soft conversation, swapping stories of their day; Gordon for once having more hypochondriacs than her, followed by his only house call of this day. Jill told him of the appendectomy she'd performed, and related a conversation she'd had with Jeff about one of the new nurses, both coming to the conclusion he was definitely smitten.

They then lapsed into silence, both content to watch the sea gradually change from a blue hue to glow with the orange of the setting sun. But Jill was still warily glancing around, taking in every figure her gaze fell upon, just in case.


	9. Chapter 9

She closed the boot of her car. She'd just returned from her house calls. Gordon's car sat beside her own, meaning he was safe in the hospital. She smiled softly to herself, the memories of the previous evening still fresh in her mind. She made her way to the pavement outside the hospital. "Oh hello Mrs Holden." One of her regular patients paused beside her.

"Oh doctor, I'm so sorry. I heard this morning. Terrible news."

"Wh-" Jill began, confused only to be cut off.

"I would stop but I'm on my way to see my nephew. You take care doctor." With a sympathetic gaze, she was off.

"Hang on. Mrs Holden!" Jill called, but her patient had already rounded the corner. She shook her head. She must have her wires crossed, Jill thought. The incident was pushed to the back of her mind as she entered reception to be greeted by a cheerful Lizzie. She smiled and rounded reception, glad the receptionist looked much happier. She passed Alun on the way, seated at the table, engrossed in the newspaper.

Ken entered just as she'd started filing the patient notes from her housecalls. He leant over Alun's shoulder to peer at the paper. "Death notices! Alun that's morbid!"

"But I'm bored." Alun moaned.

"Bored! What have I told you? Never say you're bored, someone will give you some't to do."

"Fine." Alun sighed, immediately turning his attention back to his newspaper.

"Hey, and don't go getting comfy again, I've got a job for you do to."

Alun sighed again and made to get up, but paused, hovering over his seat, his attention fixed on the newspaper. "Erm, Ken."

"What?" The older porter stepped back into reception.

"I think you should read this."

"No way am I reading that thing. I told you, it's morbid."

"No, really... I think you should."

Something in Alun's tone must have convinced him, for Ken came over and followed the finger pointed at the page. Jill glanced up again, just in time to see the colour drain from Ken's face, his expression of shock matching Alun's, before they both turned to her. "Doctor Weatherill..."

* * *

Gordon looked up from his paperwork as a sharp rapping was heard on his door. "Come in." He called, and immediately Alun and Staff Nurse Taylor burst in.

"Doctor Ormerod." She began. "You'd better come, it's Doctor Weatherill."

He shot to his feet, fear seizing him at their tone. "What about her? Where is she?"

"In her office." Alun provided, both of them following Gordon as he walked past them.

They had only taken a step into the corridor when a patient walked into their path. On seeing them, she stopped short, screamed and dropped her bags.

"Are you okay?" Gordon asked, looking in concern at the pale form in staring at him.

"I'll deal with her." Meryl cut in, ushering Gordon out the way. "You see to your wife."

Gordon glanced back once in confusion before striding the short distance to the white door bearing Jill's brass name plaque. Ken stepped up to him, holding out the local paper, open on the death notices. He followed where Ken was pointing, reading the small paragraph, a cold feeling sweeping through him.

_Dr Gordon Ormerod. _

_Beloved son, husband and father._

_ A friend to all who knew him and a treasured doctor. _

_May he rest in peace._

He had to read the words many times to be sure they were right, to be sure it was actually his name. He shivered, the feeling at reading his own death notification indescribable.

"I showed it to Doctor Weatherill. She started shaking and then she ran to her office. I never imagined she'd react like that. Sorry doctor."

"It's alright Ken." Gordon replied somewhat absent mindedly, fighting to regain his composure. "You weren't to know." He took another moment to collect himself then knocked on the varnished wood of his wife's door. "Jill love, it's me, can I come in?" After hearing a reply, he entered and closed the door behind him.

Jill turned to face him, perching on the edge of her desk. Her face, a picture of sadness and worry, held the signs of recent tears. "I'm sorry Gordon. It's just, in the paper-"

"I know." He cut her off gently. "Ken told me." He walked towards her quickly as a tear slipped down her cheek. Before she had chance to wipe it away herself, his hand was there, gently capturing the moisture before it travelled further. Though no more tears were imminent, he kept his hand to her cheek, tenderly stroking the soft skin. Being perched on her desk knocked a couple of inches from her height, allowing to to gaze up at him, her eyes holding such trust and love.

"Are you free for lunch?" She asked softly, not wanting to break the quiet closeness they shared.

He nodded. "I'm ready now if you want to get out of here for a while."

"Please." She rose, regretfully breaking the contact between them, brushing past him, and taking her coat and bag from the stand by the door.

"I'm sorry doctor." Ken started as soon as they stepped out into the corridor.

"It's alright." She replied, laying her hand briefly on the porter's arm. "I'm glad you told me."


	10. Chapter 10

"I suppose it should explain why people have been looking at me with sympathy all morning, and why Mrs Holden said she was very sorry about the 'terrible news'."

"Yes, it would also explain why a patient saw me, promptly screamed and dropped her bags." He threw a small smile at her, hoping to try and make light of the situation. She returned his smile, but both knew that neither were genuine. "We're going to have to inform the police."

"I know." She sighed, tightening her hold on his hand. They were walking hand in hand down into the town centre, towards a bakery they both liked and frequented. She sighed again, suddenly weary of the whole situation. Why would someone do this to them? She just wished it would all just go away, but knew it was a futile wish.

"You okay?" Gordon looked over to her at hearing her sighing.

"Yes, I'm just so... angry!" She clenched the fingers of her free hand into a fist and hit it against her thigh, as if to emphasise her point. "Who thinks they have the right to do this to someone? No one has the right!"

"I know." Gordon said softly, leading her to the right, starting down a narrow deserted path, stopping when it turned, providing a secluded spot, unseen from the road. He pulled her against him, sliding his arms around her.

"It's just not fair." She said quietly, dropping her head to his shoulder and gripping him tightly.

"I know sweetheart." He murmured, his hand moving to the base of her head, his fingers alternately stroking the soft hairs there, and the nape of her neck. "I think we should tell Matron and Mr Middleditch. No doubt they'll hear gossip anyway." The only response he received was a nod against his shoulder so he continued. "I also think the rest of the staff should know, gossip does tend to become warped. It'll stop everyone asking the same questions." Again she nodded, murmuring her agreement.

They stayed like that for some time, both savouring the feel of the other against them, providing comfort and hope that the situation would, eventually be okay. Eventually, Jill pulled away, trailing her hands down his arms to hold his. "We should probably make a move. I'm hungry and we haven't got long until we need to be back." She released one of his hands and led him back onto the main path, pausing only to glance around as she reached the top, just in case...


	11. Chapter 11

They walked slowly hand in hand back up The Esplanade towards the hospital. The red brick building was visible some distance in front of them, standing out proudly amongst the other structures. Jill squeezed Gordon's hand gently, attracting his attention. "Look." She pointed towards the roof. There, amongst the green copper domes, was Alun, balanced precariously next to a chimney stack.

"What is he doing?" Gordon muttered, squinting against the sun. From their distance, the object Alun yielded looked like a ship's wheel.

"I've no idea." She replied, swaying into him as she wasn't watching the path in front of them. "But whatever it is won't surprise me, I'm sure. I've learnt that him and Ken are capable of doing anything."

Gordon laughed in response, squeezing her hand gently. She smiled, realising how nice it was to have a conversation that didn't consist of the events of the past few days.

"Jill." The urgency of Gordon's tone broke through her thoughts. He nodded towards the roof when she glanced at him. Alun seemed to be wavering, his arms flew out either side, circling wildly. Jill's hand flew to her mouth as all they could do was stand and watch, frozen. Even from their distance, they could hear Alun's scream as he disappeared from view.

They turned to each other, sharing a wide-eyed look of shook, before breaking into a run towards the hospital.

* * *

Jill and Gordon dashed past the front of the hospital, past many a startled nurse, and rounded the corner into the ambulance bay, turning right, they passed through the door into the gardens. Many nurses had crowded around, their uniforms creating a sea of cobalt blue. In the centre Ken was just visible, his hands on the grey ladder in front of him, staring upwards towards the roof. They made their way through the crowd, the blue parting before them, bringing them closer to the scene they could feared they'd find. Eventually they pushed past the last row of nurses, but the scene was not as expected. The only porter in the garden was Ken. Alun was nowhere to be seen.

"Ken?" Jill gasped, stopping next to him. "What happened?"

"I, don't know." The porter tore his gaze from the roof. "Alun, he just slipped. He's still up there but hasn't made a noise."

"Alun!" Gordon bellowed. Everyone was silent, the only noise was his heavy breathing, matched by Jill's as they recovered from their run. "Alun!" He called again. If Alun was conscious he would most certainly be able to hear that volume of noise.

There was no reply.

The three glanced at each worriedly, whilst a mummer of worry rippled through their audience. Jill stepped forward, gently pushing Ken aside. She placed her foot on the bottom rung, then started up the ladder.

"Jill, no."

But Jill continued, climbing steadily up the ladder, ignoring Gordon's plea. She just hoped one of them was holding it steady at the bottom. "Alun." She called. "Are you okay?" She heard some form of a response, but couldn't decipher the words. She reached the top, but still she couldn't see the young porter. Gingerly, she stepped onto the tiles, taking care to avoid the gutter. Luckily the weather was dry, meaning the mossy tiles weren't slippery, but she still felt unstable; the tiles sloping rather steeply towards the gardens below. She glanced down, seeing Gordon holding the ladder, both him and Ken looking up at her.


	12. Chapter 12

She clambered along the roof, using her hands to steady herself. "Alun," she tried again. "Can you hear me?"

"Yes."

The reply startled her slightly, coming louder and clearer than she would have expected. She paused, balancing herself against a raised triangle of roofing above one of the attic windows. "Where are you Alun?"

"The other side, behind the chimney. I'm okay though."

"Look, just stay there. Wait for me to examine you."

"No, Doctor, really, I'm fine."

"Look Alun," She sighed, shifting her grip on the raised roofing as her foot slipped slightly. "Do you think you were unconscious for any period of time?"

"Yes..."

"Well then!" She exclaimed. "Stay there."

"Fine." He resigned, and she couldn't help but smile at the tone of his voice.

Now Alun was convinced, the only thing left to do was make her way over to him. Easy. Or so she tried to convince herself. She glanced around, trying to judge the best way up. The easiest way she could see was to get herself up onto the raised triangle of roof she was currently clutching. From there she could reach the top of the roof and use the chimney stack as support to get her over.

She bit her lip, readying herself, trying not to think of the consequences if she did fall. Eventually, after being unsuccessful in this task, she began. She shifted her grip on the dormer window, easing as much of her torso over it as she could before lifting her leg, trying to find some leverage on the tiles, but foot immediately slipped. She once again steadied herself, realising her shoes were going to have to go. Using the toes of the other foot, she eased the black polished leather off, pushing them into the gutter behind her. She tested her grip again, but still it slipped. With a sigh, she realised the tights would have to be removed aswell. This was going to be tricky. Hugging the roof of the dormer window to her with one arm, she gingerly raised one leg, pulling the thin fabric from it with one hand. Gasps were audible from the gathering crowd of onlookers, as was Gordon's shout of her name, but she ignored them, repeating the process on the other leg. The only thing she was grateful of was that Mr Rose wasn't amongst the crowd as she finally dispensed of her tights.

She tried again what she'd started before, finding her bare foot to provide much more stability. With one foot on the roof, she brought her free leg up, slinging it over the dormer so she was eventually straddling it. This done, and a relatively balanced position held, she took a moment to collect herself and calculate her next move. As she glanced from the narrow top of the triangle upon which she was sat, to the chimney stack and the top of the hospital, she began to think her original plan was flawed. How on Earth was she to balance, find grip and leverage to heave herself up there? Added to which a thought that wasn't at all helpful at that moment in time; how on Earth was she going to get herself and Alun down?


	13. Chapter 13

After a moment composing herself, Jill gingerly rose. Using her knees to grip the roof of the dormer window, she leant forwards, her hands coming into contact with the terracotta tiles in front of her. Then, with her weight resting mostly through her hands and torso, she moved her right leg, scraping it painfully until her shin lay upon the top edge of the triangle. Weight was then put upon that shin, pain shooting through her as tiles pressed against the bone; the thin covering of skin doing little to protect it. She then heaved her left leg up, placing her foot upon the roof just in front of her right knee. This allowed her, after a moment to regain her balance, to bring her right foot onto the triangle of roofing, and eventually rise into a standing position. From there, she could reach the chimney stack. She skimmed her right hand up towards the stack, reluctant to break contact with the tiles.

"No! Doctor stop!"

She froze at hearing Ken's voice. She didn't dare reply, for fear of disrupting the precarious balance she held.

"Don't touch the chimney. It's not safe."

Her eyes widened, a physical visualisation of her fear as it registered what could happen if she did indeed touch it. Her hand quickly slid down the roof towards her. "What shall I do?" She called, her gaze fixed on the orange brick in front of her; she didn't dare look down.

"Over to your left, at the very end. You go up there."

She glanced across, seeing a right angle in the roof where the hospital edged round the courtyard. She made her way over, seeing it looked easier. There even seemed to be tiles positioned which created hand- and foot-holds. She reached the top without too much difficulty, though she had to steady herself, the breeze catching her off guard.

The view in front of her was off the road running alongside the front of the hospital. Shuttleworth Garden was behind that, and she could even see the nurses' home, a few of the blue-clad figures wandering towards the building. If she was not in such a perilous position she would have been able to enjoy it.

Turning her attention back to the roof, she glanced along until her gaze fell upon Alun. He was to the right and below her, wedged between the chimney and two dormer windows.

* * *

It was surprisingly easy to reach Alun, and once she was balanced beside him, she proceeded to examine him. She checked his eyes, finding the pupils equal and reactive to the light. His strength was also equal on both sides of his body, and his memory seemed fine. He wasn't dizzy, and his only other injuries were a few grazes and bruises.

"Well I'd say you're fine Alun." She smiled at him. "Although when we get down, I'd like to keep you under observation for a few hours as you were unconscious for a period of time."

"Thanks Doctor." He returned her smile, easing himself into a standing position. "Shall I go first, I know the best route after all."

She nodded, gesturing for him to lead the way, grateful she didn't have to navigate the roof on her own again. He took her back the way she'd come, helping to steady her over the more perilous areas, until they reached the dormer window. Alun vaulted it quite nimbly, obviously well practised, but she took her time, levering herself up as she had done before. She eased herself down the other side as she had done previously. However, her foot, upon which most of her weight rested, slipped, sending her sliding downwards. She scrabbled desperately at the tiles. Her hands gained no purchase; there was just nothing to cling onto.

"Jill!"

"Doctor!"

Both Gordon and Alun shouted simultaneously, accompanied by gasps from the gathering crowd.

After what seemed like an age, but was in fact only seconds, of sliding, her feet came into contact with something, stopping her descent. Then, a firm pressure was placed on her back, preventing her from spiralling backwards and downwards.

"You okay doctor?"

"Erm, yes... yes." She whispered, breathing deeply, trying to force her heart rate to change from the speedy thundering it had adopted. It took her a moment to realise her feet were lodged firmly in the gutter, and that the pressure on her back was Alun's hand.

"Come on, just a few more steps then you can down the ladder."

She nodded, shuffling gingerly sideways, stopping only when she reached the ladder.

"You go first. I'll bring your shoes"

"Thanks." She replied softly, glancing briefly at her shoes where she'd left them in the gutter. Alun placed a hand on her arm, steadying her as she placed her foot on the metal rung and began a slow climb down. She reached the bottom with such relief, never so glad to have her feet firmly back on the ground. She thanked Ken, then walked away from the ladder.

"Jill." He took her elbow, stopping her in her tracks.

"I'm fine Gordon." She uttered before he could speak, smiling reassuringly at him.

He pulled her a few steps away from the ladder as Alun neared the bottom. He took her other elbow, looking at her with concern. "You're shaking." He whispered gently. His thumbs glided back and forth over her arms in a comforting motion.

"I'm fine." She repeated, smiling again. "I must see to Alun." She placed a trembling hand on his arm briefly, then led Alun into the hospital, pausing only to slide into her shoes, slightly scuffed from all the activity.


	14. Chapter 14

Jill checked her watch with a sigh. Evening surgery had started and she was late. She'd just finished assessing Alun who was comfortably settled into Milner Ward for the night. She hurried down the corridor towards reception, ignoring the curious looks of those she passed. She looked a mess, but she had no time to sort herself out. Her clothes were dirty and stained with moss, her legs were grazed and her hair was askew, strands flying every which way and the whole lot threatening to escape from its ponytail.

She entered the small staff area behind reception, handing her Alun's file to Lizzie, and receiving a stack of notes in return. She almost groaned when she took in the height of the stack, and she did groan when she glanced at the crowed waiting room, full of miserable looking patients and at least five screaming toddlers. She glanced at the file on the pile; three year old Jessica Norris, no doubt one of the screaming youngsters who was going to considerably lengthen her afternoon surgery and put pay to her hearing for the rest of the day.

She took a step into the corridor, when Gordon appeared before her, pushing her gently backwards, out of view of the patients. He took hold of her hand, stroking it gently with his thumb as she looked at her, his expression holding the same concern as before. "Are you okay Jill?"

She smiled softly, touched by his concern, and placed her free hand on his cheek as if to emphasise her point. "I'm fine. Don't worry. I really must get on, I'm behind as it is." She gestured to the reception behind him.

"Of course." He replied but made no move to release her hand. He continued. "I saw your first two patients."

"Thank you Gordon." Her smile widened. She leant forward and kissed him quickly on the cheek. She made to enter reception, but a thought made her pause. Her voice lowered and became serious. "After surgery I'll phone the police, inform them about the newspaper."

He nodded. "Good idea. And then maybe we can speak to Matron and Mr Middleditch."

She too nodded, returning his solemn gaze, before an increase in the volume of the crying children reached her, forcing her to return to work.

* * *

Jill exited her consulting room, feeling considerably smarter than half an hour previously. Afternoon surgery was done, she'd phoned Ashfordly police, and then had time to tidy herself up. Her moss-stained clothes had been discarded for the spare suit she kept in her cupboard. Her hair was once again fixed firmly into the ponytail, complete with beehive and ribbon. And her grazed legs were clean, with tights hiding the cuts and bruises.

"Jill?" He attracted her attention, stepping towards her, taking her wrist and leading her to the side of the corridor. "What did they say?"

She inclined her head towards him, her voice low, glancing around to be sure no one was near. "They said they'd contact the newspaper, make enquiries as to who placed the notice, though they're not too hopeful."

He nodded and sighed, sliding his hand from her wrist to clasp her slender fingers. "Do they have any leads from our neighbours?"

"No, no one saw anything apparently." She sighed then laughed. "Typical, the one time we want people to be nosey, they aren't." Gordon stayed silent, merely toying with her wedding ring on her finger, obviously not finding her attempt to make light of the situation humorous. She continued, "They want me to speak to them. I said I might get chance at lunch tomorrow."

"I'll come with you."

"You don't have to."

"I want to." His eyes held such sincerity and concern, and she looked down shyly.

"Thank you." When she looked back at him, her lips were curved into a small smile. "I'd like that."


	15. Chapter 15

She knocked on the dark shiny wood of the door, just above the brass name plaque reading the administrator's name. Immediately receiving a reply, she opened it.

"Ah Doctor Weatherill. What can I do for you?"

"Erm I was wondering if Gordon and I could have a word?"

"Yes, yes of course, do come in, sit down."

She entered, easing herself down in one of the three chairs in front of the mahogany desk, closely followed by Gordon who took the chair next to her.

"Matron's on her way." Gordon said, before falling silent, neither willing to relay the details of the previous few days.

Mr Middleditch slowly removed his glasses and folded them, gazing at them both steadily. "This sounds serious."

"Somewhat." Jill breathed through a nervous laugh. "You see there was an... incident, the other night."

"Ah yes. Matron told me about that."

Jill averted her gaze, blushing profusely. On the one hand she was glad she didn't have to recreate the scenario for Mr Middleditch's benefit, but on the other, she would have been able to reveal to him just what she wanted to. She was incredibly embarrassed at how she'd acted in front of Matron, she still couldn't quite look her in the eye.

"Such terrible business." He continued, laying his glasses gently onto the desk. The contact of the metal frame with the wood made no noise. "Have you any idea of the reason behind it?"

"None." Gordon replied, covering her hand with his own. He was about to say more when Matron stepped through the open doorway.

"You wanted to see me doctors?"

Both Jill and Gordon nodded, whilst Mr Middleditch spoke. "Do take a seat Matron."

She thanked him courtly. The only chair left was next to Gordon, which she moved, angling it so she could see Jill aswell as the other two. Gordon spoke first. "I'm afraid there have been some developments, regarding the, er, incident." Neither knew how to phrase the emotional turmoil they'd been put through, but the word was sufficient, all four occupants of the room knew what was being discussed.

"Am I right in saying this has something to do with today's paper?" Matron asked, placing the Elsinby Herald upon the desk.

"Yes."

"Matron?" Mr Middleditch questioned, his face a picture of confusion. Obviously he was one of the few members of the hospital who had been untouched by the current topic of gossip.

Wordlessly, Matron opened the paper and pointed to the section in question. Mr Middleditch picked up his glasses, unfolded them and returned them to his face. Whilst he did this with painstaking slowness, Gordon squeezed Jill's hand. They glanced at each other, flashing the other a smile of support.

"Well." Mr Middleditch finally spoke, once again removing his glasses. "This person certainly seems persistent." He sighed. "And you've no idea who could be behind this?"

"No." Gordon said whilst Jill shook her head.

"Is there anything you want me to do?"

"No, I don't think there is anything anyone could do." Jill replied, sighing. "We just thought you should both be kept informed. It is something that could affect the hospital."

"Yes of course, thank you. I do see a problem with gossip though."

"Indeed. Gordon and I discussed this and have decided to make an announcement at Friday's staff meeting. Hopefully we can explain everything and reduce some of the speculation."

Matron nodded. "A wise idea. It should prevent exaggeration and embellishment of the situation which gossip in this place tends to cause." She paused, gazing at them for a moment. "How are you both?"

"We're fine." Jill said quickly, but politely. "We just want to find out who's doing this, and why."

This seemed to appease Mr Middleditch, but Matron continued to gaze at them, an expression on her face showing she didn't believe her words. But thankfully, with her immense wisdom and tact, she remained silent.

Gordon squeezed Jill's hand, telling her he, too, knew she wasn't being entirely truthful. "We'd better be getting on." He spoke, rising from his seat. "Thank you for your time."

Jill echoed her thanks, and followed Gordon out the room, closing the door softly behind them.

"Meet after our ward rounds?" Gordon questioned softly. "I think a quiet night in front of the fire is in order."

Jill nodded and smiled. When times were tough, he always seemed to know exactly what she needed.


	16. Chapter 16

The wards rounds had thankfully passed without complication. Jill had only been in her office for a few minutes when Gordon entered. They shortly left, bidding Lizzie farewell on the way. She seemed very cheerful, looking forward to a night out with Alun, Frankie and some of the nurses. Jill was thankful for this, happy to see the receptionist much more like her old self.

They'd eaten a peaceful dinner after they'd arrived home, throughout which Jill had to repeatedly assure Gordon she was quite alright after her escapades on the roof. After a joint effort in washing the dishes, they'd entered the living room, disregarding the settees, choosing instead to settle upon the floor in front of one, wrapped in a blanket with the blazing fire before them. Jill had started a Cat Stevens record and its soft music reached them at a volume to be easily audible, but not so loud as to interrupt their conversation.

Gordon once again checked she was okay, to which her only response was rolling her eyes. After a while, she did, however, own up to a slight ache through her body and allowed him to massage her shoulders. Not that she was complaining.

She closed her eyes as she relaxed, allowing herself to concentrate upon the sensations he created as his hands moved across her shoulders. He occasionally leant forward, brushing his lips against her neck, causing her to emit a contented sigh. He was in the process of placing one such kiss when a sharp rapping, coming from the front door could be heard. He paused in his movements, and she stiffened beneath his hands, undoing all his work. The hand she'd placed upon his thigh tensed, and her heart rate accelerated, creating a queasiness within her.

"I'll go." Gordon uttered softly, sliding his hands down her arms gently before he made to get up. She increased the pressure of her hand upon his thigh, stopping him. Instead, she rose, and made her way out into the hall and towards the front door, already putting on an act of confidence.

Gordon strained to hear as she opened the door and partook in a brief conversation with the visitor before closing it again. He heard the two metal bolts slide across then her footsteps nearing the living room. However, the footsteps continued past the room and he frowned, until the sounds of the bolts sliding across on the back door reached him and his expression turned to one of realisation. He sighed sadly. It had become routine for her; not only did both doors have to be locked by the key as they normally did, but both bolts had to be used as well. For her, it was 'just in case' or 'you can never be too careful', both of which she repeated to him many a times. And he agreed, to an extent, and it seemed to help her feel safer, so he wasn't going to stop her. Still, he couldn't help but worry about her.

He turned her attention away from his thoughts and to the woman in question as she returned and settled against him. "Who was it?" He asked, whilst pulling the blanket around her, smiling as she slid her arms around him.

"Oh just someone selling something."

"At this time of night?"

"That's what he said." She shrugged. "I didn't recognise him anyway.

He gazed at her sadly, knowing just who her comment referred to, just who she hadn't wanted to see and recognise on their doorstep. He ran a hand through her hair and stroked her back, glad to feel her relaxing a little beneath his hands. He sighed softly, feeling her hair move with his exhalation. Despite trying to hide it from him, he knew she was constantly on guard. He only wished he could erase her fears. In the long term, he couldn't. But, in the short term, perhaps he could provide some reprieve.

His slide his hand to her chin, raising her head and placing his lips on hers, gently deepening it, increasing the passion. Her hands slide from around him, instead moving gently over him as his did over her. And thus, for the next hour they concentrated completely on the other, all worries forgotten, which was, ultimately, his aim.


	17. Chapter 17

Gordon looked sidelong at his wife sat beside him. He could see the tension through her body, though not due the usual composure she held. Instead, he knew, this tension was due to the emotions she had been put through in the previous few days.

He stayed silent, allowing her time to compose herself. He reach out a hand and took hers, squeezing it gently, hoping to convey his support and patience. Her lips drew up into a small smile, which she threw in his direction before she inhaled deeply and spoke.

"I suppose we ought to go in."

"There's no rush." He replied gently, squeezing her hand again.

She shook her head and slid her hand from his. "No I'm ready. Come on." She climbed out the car, and after a moment, he did the same, locking it before following her towards the building in of them.

"Ah Doctor Weatherill... And Dr Ormerod." Alf Ventress greeted them as they entered. "Come through. Sergeant Miller and PC Bellamy are waiting for you."

They followed him through a short corridor, past the staff area to a white door. He knocked, and after receiving a reply, opened the door for them, allowing them through before closing it after them.

"Mr and Mrs Ormerod I presume. Hello." The man behind the wide oak desk rose, extending his hand for them each to shake. "Please take a seat." At which all four occupants of the room did so. Sergeant Miller was seated in a broad leather chair behind the desk. Jill and Gordon sat side by side in front of the desk, their orange plastic chairs not unlike the visitors' chairs in the offices at The Royal. PC Bellamy was the remaining occupant, seated to the side of the desk.

* * *

"Now, this is just an informal chat. Just to brief you on how we're progressing with the investigation and to see if you remember any more about the evening. I'm also lead to believe you have something further of which to inform me."

"That's correct." Jill said nodding. Sergeant Miller's silence urged her to continue. "Yesterday's local paper, there was an article." She handed it across the desk. "It, well, I'll let you read it for yourself."

Miller read the section in question and wordlessly passed it to PC Bellamy. Only when Bellamy looked up did Miller speak. "Thank you for bringing this to our attention Mrs Ormerod. I imagine this must have been another shock for you." He spoke with sympathy, though his next words were grave. "We'll contact the paper, but I'm not hopeful. Any name left would likely have been false. As would the name that he told you. Have you remembered that yet?"

"No." She replied, feeling a familiar rush of frustration as she failed to once again recall details of that day.

"Can you remember anything new?"

"No." She said again. "Everything else just seemed insignificant, unimportant to what he told me."

"I understand. I'd still like you to take us through the events of that night again, in case you missed something out the first time around."

A feeling of dread filled her. She tried so hard not to think of that night but now the devastating words he told her echoed round her head once again. Nevertheless, she nodded and began. She told them every little detail she could remember, however small, in the hope it would lead the police closer to a conclusion. To her right, PC Bellamy scribbled onto his pad of paper, seemingly recording every word she uttered. When she came to the point in her account where the man told her of Gordon's accident, she paused, hearing her voice crack with a surge of emotions. She inhaled deeply, releasing it slowly, steadying her breathing. In her peripheral vision, her saw Gordon turn to look at her. She took another long breath then continued. Her gaze was fixed on the patterns in the dark wood of Miller's desk. Only when she finished did she look up.

Miller nodded at her, his expression set in grim sympathy. "Thank you Mrs Ormerod. Now I want you both to think." He glanced at Gordon. "Is there anyone who might want to hurt you like this. Anyone at all, even if you think there is only the smallest possibility."

"No one." Gordon immediately answered, his tone tense, gradually building with anger as he spoke. "Neither of us have done anything to make someone want to do this. What he did to Jill, what he's still doing, it's awful, completely cruel!"

"It's alright Gordon." She said softly.

"It's not!" He shot back.

She flinched.

"How can it be alright? Someone out there is continuing to torment us. And we can't do anything about it!"

"I assure you we are doing our very best for you. But Mr Ormerod please calm down!" Miller's sharp tone silenced Gordon, but a glance to him showed Jill he was still aggravated.

"Please Gordon." She said quietly, gazing at him imploringly.

It took a few moments, but eventually, some of the tension visibly left his body, and his expression turned to one of contrition. "I'm sorry." He said, taking her hand. "I'm sorry." He repeated glancing between Sergeant Miller and PC Bellamy.

"It's alright." Miller replied whilst Bellamy nodded, his expression showing his understanding. "Unfortunately, we have very little to go on. But we are taking this very seriously."

"I know that." Gordon replied, his tone still holding a note of regret at his outburst. "I didn't mean to suggest you weren't."

Jill glanced at him. She knew the situation was difficult for him, but she hadn't realised how hard he had taken it all. She squeezed his hand firmly, attempting to provide a little comfort. She realised it had worked as they glanced at each other, sharing an understanding. Both turned back to the sergeant as he spoke.

"Thank you both for coming in. We'll let you know as soon as we know anything. Again, please don't hesitate to contact us if you have any suspicions."

They all rose and shook hands before Jill and Gordon exited the room. She still had a tight hold of his hand and led him out the station, bidding PC Ventress farewell as they passed. Once outside, she pulled him aside into a hug.

"I'm sorry." He murmured, placing a kiss into her hair.

She tightened her arms around him, hoping to sooth him. "It's alright. I do understand."

"It's just..." He sighed and pulled away from her, sliding his hands from her back to rest on her waist. "Someone's hurt you so much. I just got angry that I can't do anything to stop it."

"Oh Gordon." She sighed, tears clouding her vision for a reason she couldn't quite pinpoint. "You are doing something. You've been so patient with me. You just being here is more than I could ask for. If something had actually happened to you, I wouldn't have been able to bear it."

This time it would Gordon who pulled her into a hug. They clung tightly, seeking comfort in the other. As long as they were together, Jill knew, whatever was thrown at them could be overcome eventually. She just hoped whatever was thrown at them wouldn't take him away from her.

* * *

They spent the journey back to The Royal in silence. The meeting with the police had put a considerable dampener on their mood. They didn't partake in any of their usual light-hearted banter, nor did they feel able to embark on a discussion of inconsequential topics.

Jill had glanced at Gordon many times whilst in the car. His expression remained the same; grimly set lips, and a tension in his jaw that told her his emotions were still running high.

"Gordon." She said quietly as the dome-topped hospital roof came into view.

"Mmm?"

She tore her gaze away from the roof, memories of the previous day still fresh in her mind. She gripped the seat as if to reassure herself she was on solid ground. "If you want, I could see your patients, let you go home."

"Why would I want to do that?" He glanced at her, his expression hard.

"It's just..." She began tentatively; she hadn't expected him to react so defensively. "I thought you might like a break, you know. This has been hard on you, and, well, you look a little tired."

"I'm fine Jill, really." Came his immediate response. "Besides, I'm anaesthetising this afternoon."

"Oh really? I though Jeff was scheduled."

"We swapped."

"Right..." She turned her attention to the passing scenery, the atmosphere in the car suddenly uncomfortable.


	18. Chapter 18

A steady stream of patients with various real, and not so real, ailments filled her afternoon. None proved too demanding, most quickly appeased with her diagnoses. Then came the ward rounds, which weren't so pleasant. Matron was breathing down her neck round Fawcett Ward; she hadn't been in a particularly sparkling mood all day. And Mr Rose felt he needed to voice his unasked-for opinion on her two patients in Milner. Needless to say she wasn't best pleased.

Despite this, she wasn't entirely happy when all was done and home beckoned. Unusually for her, she dithered in her office, then at reception, before finally making it out into the car park, by which time Gordon's car had gone. Then she embarked on the drive home, apprehension filling her as she neared her destination.

After their exchange of words in the car earlier that day, Jill had entered the hospital quickly and busied herself with work. She'd only seen Gordon twice since then, passing each other in the corridor, but no words were spoken. The tension hadn't been resolved.

She arrived home reluctantly, unable to put it off any longer. Although, she did manage to spend a whole five minutes tidying the glove compartment of the mini. With a sigh, she left the car and walked up to the house. She unlocked the front door slowly and stepped inside, unsure how her arrival would be received.

Again, she took her time; removing her coat with deliberate slowness, and aligning her shoes perfectly in the cupboard. During which time, she ascertained Gordon's location in the kitchen, by the sounds it emitted.

"Peace offering?" He turned when she finally entered, holding a glass of wine out to her.

She took it, murmuring her thanks. "Look Gordon, I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to sound like I thought you couldn't cope. I just-"

"Jill." He cut her off. "I know you didn't mean that. I'm the one who should be apologising, biting your head off when you were only caring about me. I know it's no excuse but-"

"Emotions were running high. I know." This time Jill interrupted Gordon. "It's been a difficult time, I understand. It's bound to affect us in one way or another."

"All the same, I'm sorry."

"Forget about it." She smiled at him, relived when he returned it. "Now cook. I'm hungry, it smells delicious, and I don't want it ruining whilst you stand here staring at me."

* * *

They spent an enjoyable dinner together, the earlier awkwardness pushed far from their minds, allowing room for gentle teasing, banter and general chat. They washed up together then spent the rest of the evening in the living room, speculating about what the children were doing, and whether they were running their grandparents ragged. Before long Jill was dozing on Gordon's shoulder as she sat slouched, perfectly comfortable, against him. He spent a few minutes just enjoying the feel of her body against him, running his hand through her silky hair and stroking her back softly. Eventually he roused her, knowing it would do her more good to be in bed.

As soon as she slipped under the duvet, Jill closed her eyes, snuggling sleepily up to Gordon. "Night love." He whispered, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"Night." She murmured back.

He hugged her close, feeling her rib cage rise and fall beneath his arm, in unison with her soft breaths hitting his neck. Her breathing slowed and deepened, pulling her towards sleep as Gordon lay awake, reflecting upon the day. He was glad Jill had forgiven his stupidity, twice, though he still felt guilty at how he'd responded to her offer of help, and a little embarrassed at how he'd acted at the police station.

He glanced down at his wife. He was so proud of how she'd held herself together whilst talking to Sergeant Miller. He knew it was hard for her to think about that terrible day, let alone recount everything she remembered, and yet she'd acted perfectly composed, only faltering the once.

He tipped his head, just about place a kiss into her hair, when her head shot up, narrowly missing hitting his chin. "What?" He exclaimed, startled.

"The doors." She answered perfectly calmly and surprisingly awake, seemingly unaware of his near-injury. "Did I lock them?"

"Yes, I'm sure you did." He sighed, already knowing his words wouldn't appease her and she'd have to go and check.

"I'll just make sure." She said, doing just as he predicted.

He sighed again as she left the room, flopping onto his back and staring at the ceiling. The sounds of her footsteps upon the carpet of the ground floor reached him, but no sound of bolts sliding or keys turning; he knew she'd already locked them. He was even sure she'd checked after their dinner.

It wasn't long before the re-entered the bedroom. He forced his tone to remain even as she slipped back under the duvet and placed her head on his chest. "Okay?"

She nodded, her hair tickling his neck as she moved. Despite himself, he smiled and wrapped his arms around her. He just had to keep reminding himself that the locks made her feel better, and if she had to check them a couple of times, it was fine.

"Night... again." She murmured and placed a kiss on his chest.

"Are you sure you want to tell them?" Gordon asked suddenly.

Jill tipped her head back, opening an eye to look at him. "Tell who?" She replied sleepily.

"Everyone at work, about... well, you know."

"Oh, mmm..." She mumbled and trailed off. She moved her head in what Gordon took to be a nod, but he couldn't be certain.


	19. Chapter 19

"Are you sure you want to tell everyone at work?"

She raised an eyebrow at him as she gazed at him over a glass of orange juice. "I'm sure you asked me that last night."

"I did but your response was hardly coherent. As I recall it was something like 'Oh, mmm', some vague movement of your head which could have been taken either way, then you fell asleep."

"Oh ha ha." Jill said, her tone heavy with sarcasm. She rolled her eyes. "And in answer to your question, yes, I think we should. I don't see any good that could come if we don't tell them."

"True." He nodded in agreement, swallowing the last of his tea before standing up. "I'll go and start getting ready."

She nodded to him, watching his retreating back. The soft thud of items hitting the hall carpet met her ears, followed by the sound of metal meeting metal. A shuffling could be heard, then Gordon's voice nearing the kitchen. "Someone's popular! I haven't got it wrong and it's actually your birthday today is it?"

She looked at him, confused, as he entered, until he handed her a wad of envelopes, each addressed to her and handwritten. "Must be some of my many boyfriends." She grinned at him as he merely raised his eyebrows at her before once again leaving the kitchen.

Gordon heard Jill climb the stairs not long after him. From behind the partially closed door of their bedroom, he paused in buttoning his shirt as he heard her pad across the hallway and into the bathroom.

Gordon pulled the knot of his tie up to his neck, straightening it, checking his appearance one final time in the mirror before heading downstairs. He entered the kitchen and stopped at the sight that met him. Paper littered the room; envelopes scattered everywhere and cards ripped in half. He frowned, picking one up piece up. The part he held was enough to tell him the mess was justified. He sighed her name and rushed upstairs, finding her in their bedroom. She was sat on the edge of the bed, her back to him, fiercely shoving her foot into a pair of tights. Inevitably, the delicate material ripped, increasing her agitation further. "Stupid things!" She growled, balling them up and flinging them across the room. She quickly crossed to the chest of drawers, heaved it open, grabbed another pair of tights and slammed it shut before seating herself on the bed once more. She then proceeded to put them on, gentler this time, but all the same, muttering angrily about 'shoddy workmanship' and 'useless, pointless things' before falling silent.

Gordon silently crossed the room and sat behind her, not touching her, not too near, and waited. He couldn't see her face; her hair still lay naturally over her shoulders as it had when she'd woken up. All through her rant she'd interrupted herself periodically with a sniff, and he'd seen her hand travel several times to her face. With tights successfully on and in one piece, she sat still, silent except for the occasional sniffle. It was when she released a long broken breath that he moved forward, sliding his arms around her. She turned, curling her legs up onto the bed and leaned into him. One hand gripped onto his shoulder whilst the other clung to the shirt at his chest.

"I'm sorry Gordon." Her voice was muffled against his chest, her tears marring her words.

He merely held her, stroking her back, hoping his actions were soothing her. Eventually, the tears slowed, her breathing becoming more even and less ragged. He pulled back to look at her, one arm still holding her securely. He stroked her cheek before moving to toy with a strand of her hair. She smiled at him weakly then glanced down, sighed at her crumpled clothes and proceeded to straighten them as much as possible with him still holding her.

Her appearance of was only half that of professional Jill, Doctor Weatherill; fully dressed in black suit and white blouse, but with unbrushed unruly hair. He personally loved her unruly hair, especially as it was the first style he saw every morning when they awoke. He loved how only himself and the children were allowed to see her like that. And only he was allowed to touch it, which he loved doing, and which he knew relaxed her. He smiled softly, proceeding to run his hand through the dark strands as he spoke gently to her.

"I saw the cards sweetheart."

She nodded, still avoiding eye contact. She wiped a hand across her damp cheek and sniffed. After a long moment of silence, just as he was about to speak again, she began to voice her thoughts. "I should have been expecting them really. It's what people do isn't it, when people have died... Condolence cards... I should have realised really, people are bound to want to, considering you're such a wonderful man." She attempted a laugh, which fell flat.

He decided to ignore her final comment for the time being, a light-hearted comment would come later. "I think under the circumstances," He began slowly, making sure she was absorbing her words. "It's understandable. You've had so much more to think about than whether people are going to send cards." He placed a finger under her chin, gently raising her head, forcing her to meet his gaze. "Stop being so hard on yourself."

"Thank you Gordon."

"No need to thank me." He moved his hand to her cheek, beginning to brush away the tears resting on her skin as he continued to speak. "I've had a thought, now it's probably a long shot, but... I think we should have another look at those cards." He caught her anguished expression and continued quickly. "We should check if there are any from people we don't recognise. He might have sent one, to add to your suffering." There was no need to elaborate you _he_ was. They both knew.

"It's possible." She nodded, quickly getting to her feet, taking him by surprise. She seemed to brighten a little with the idea that some good may come from the cards.

He rose. Taking her hand, stopping her just as she was about to leave the bedroom. "How about you give this wonderful man a smile." He asked, referring to her earlier uttered comment.

She acquiesced, her lips curving up. It wasn't her usual smile, but that was to be expected. She placed a hand on his cheek and leant towards him, placing a soft kiss on his cheek. "I know you say there's no need, but still; thank you Gordon."

* * *

"What about this one?"

Jill turned her attention to the name Gordon pointed at. "Lilly Marsh... No I think she's my patient."

The ripped card was discarded and Jill pulled another towards them. They were sat in the kitchen, the table holding the torn paper. Their chairs were side by side, Jill's leg pressed against Gordon's, their heads bent, close together as they scrutinised the senders.

"Hannah Graham?" He glanced at Jill.

"Erm..." She was silent for a moment, turning the name over in her mind. "I don't recognise the name."

"Well we'll have a look at the patient files at work."

She nodded, putting it to one side. The last two cards were both from Gordon's patients. She drew all the cards into a pile, leaving the one from Hannah Graham on the side, and spent a little longer than was necessary straightening them into a neat pile. She placed them deliberately carefully upon the table. As she did so she caught sight of Gordon's watch. Immediately, she shot up from her chair, pushing it backwards with a scrape on the tiled floor, allowing her room to dash past Gordon and out of the room.

Gordon stared after her for a second, a little bewildered, before, following her, concerned that she was upset about the cards again. "Jill?" He called, rounding the door to their bedroom, stopping short at the sight before him.

Jill stood in front of their mirror, frantically brushing her hair back behind her head into a ponytail, clip in mouth whilst trying to open her drawer with her foot. He laughed, bending down and opening the drawer for her, revealing her make-up. He received a grunt in response. She bent around him, sliding the hair piece into place and clicking it around her ponytail, before grabbing various items from the drawer.

"Erm... Jill?" He looked at her raising his eyebrow and smirking with amusement.

"Have you not seen the time Gordon? We're going to be late for the staff meeting!"

He smirked again at the high pitched panic in her voice. The smile was quickly wiped from his face with a glance at his watch. They had five minutes to get to The Royal. Even he wouldn't be able to make it, despite all he needed to do was put on his shoes and grab his coat and doctor's bag. Jill was rushing her make-up, frequently cursing as she smudged this or streaked that.

"You know you could always go without make-up, you don't need it." He ventured, knowing very well what her answer would be.

She paused briefly to look at him, turning back to the mirror as she replied. "Thank you love, but no. There is no way I'm going into work like this. I might as well go in naked!"

He coughed. "Slight exaggeration I think darling."

She grinned at him, moments later throwing down her lipstick. "I'm done. Go go go!" She dashed out the room, grabbing his hand and dragging him down the stairs.


	20. Chapter 20

They arrived at The Royal only five minutes late. Nevertheless, as they entered reception, the faces of the entire assembled staff turned to them, making them both redden considerably.

"Doctors Ormerod and Weatherill. Nice of you to join us." Mr Harper glared at them from the other side of them room.

As they edged behind everyone, Jill caught Matron's gaze, expecting to see a similar disapproving expression, but she smiled softly, tipping her an almost imperceptible nod.

Surprisingly two chairs were free side by side at the back, and they sat, relieved when everyone's attention returned to Mr Middleditch. Jill glanced at Gordon, catching his eye, their embarrassment obvious to the other.

She turned her attention back to Mr Middleditch, trying to listen to the numerous announcements he was listing, but her mind was elsewhere, worry was setting in. Soon either Gordon or herself would have to stand up tell all their colleagues everything. She would have to relive it once again.

All too soon Mr Middleditch came to the end of the announcements. "Thank you for listening everyone. Now I believe Doctors Ormerod and Weatherill have something quite serious to tell us."

For the second time that morning, all eyes were on the two doctors. Gordon was just about to stand when Jill surprised him by rising. "Yes Mr Middleditch." She replied quite calmly and recited all that had happened, with only as much detail as the staff needed to know. He gazed up at her composed form as she spoke, once again enormously proud of how she was handling it all.

She finished, nodding at Mr Middleditch as she lowered herself to her seat, immediately reaching out and sliding her hand into Gordon's. The rest of the staff were still staring at them, their expressions mixed; some appeared shocked, others upset or filled with sympathy, and some looked angry. The room was filled with murmurs and whispers as they discussed what they had just heard, until Mr Middleditch gathered their attention.

Gordon squeezed Jill's hand, making her turn to him as Mr Middleditch drew the meeting to a close. "Well done love." He whispered, leaning in and quickly kissing her cheek whilst no one was looking.

* * *

"Doctors!"

Jill and Gordon both jumped as Lizzie dashed past them, round into the staff area. They had been so absorbed in the other they hadn't noticed the rest of the congregation were dispersing to their respective tasks. For the third time that morning Jill felt her cheeks redden. She quickly stood, moving her chair, allowing people to pass more easily. Gordon followed suit and together they moved to the reception desk, bemusedly watching Lizzie muttering to herself and lifting various sheets of paper haphazardly stacked into vague looking piles.

"Here they are!" She finally declared, brandishing two pieces of paper, handing one to each of the doctors. "Your patient lists. And... Hang on a mo!"

Jill glanced at Gordon, biting her lip to stop herself laughing. This scene was one they were regularly greeted with, and whilst Jill, Gordon and most of the other staff found it endearing, Mr Harper found it highly irritating, illustrated at that particular movement as he bustled in, an expression of self-importance on his face. Gordon caught Jill's eye. They both knew what was coming.

"Lizzie! Look at this mess! How on Earth are you meant to find anything? I'm putting some paperwork here. I want them filed. And make sure you can file them so you can find them again!" With that he bustled back out, barking an order at a loitering nurse on the way.

Lizzie turned back to the doctors, a scowl pressed firmly on her features. "That man!" She huffed, returning to her previous search. "And here's your post!" She finally cried, surprisingly brightly considering the expression on her face.

"Thank you Lizzie." Gordon replied, taking a small stack of letters from her. Jill did the same.

She turned, flicking through her pile, consisting of two medical journals, various letters of correspondence, and three handwritten envelopes, the rigidity of which told her they contained cards.

Gordon, having seen these, placed a hand on the small of her back, leading her into her office and closing the door behind them. He gently extracted the cards from her hands and placed them in her desk drawer, shutting it firmly. "We'll go through these together at lunch, like we did this morning."

She nodded. "Let's go out after, give us something to look forward to."

"Good plan." He replied, leaning to place a kiss on her cheek. He made his way to her door, opening it, pausing just before he stepped out into the corridor. "Love you." He closed the door behind him, leaving Jill with a smile on her face. Whatever was thrown at her, Gordon always managed to make it a little better. She just hoped he'd always be around to do that.


	21. Chapter 21

It turned out Gordon wasn't available at lunch time after all. According to Lizzie, he was in theatre, in what was looking to be a lengthy operation on a man who had fallen through his roof.

So Jill was left to have lunch alone. Though the cards could have waited until later, she decided to start on them, the hope that they might lead to a clue was too strong to put off for any longer. She took the cards out of her desk drawer, tearing the envelopes open with some trepidation, but also hope. The first card was from her old neighbour but she put it aside, resolving to reply and explain the mistake. The second card bore a name she didn't recognise.

"Ian Holbert." She whispered the name; as if saying it aloud would conjure anything in her memory. It didn't. The third card from the same, this time from a Toby Fitzgerald.

She immediately made her way to reception, taking the cards with her. She found Toby Fitzgerald easily enough. He was one of Gordon's patients and a look at the last entry in his file, made in her husband's familiar handwriting, told her that Mr Fitzgerald hadn't been to see him for nearly five years.

A search under Holbert and under Graham revealed no Ian or Hannah. It was entirely possible they weren't patients but she decided to ask Lizzie; it wouldn't be the first time she'd filed something in a totally inconceivable manner.

"I haven't heard of him but Hannah Graham is in with the Sutcliffe's doctor!" Lizzie explained as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. She opened the drawer marked 'S' and immediately pulled out the file in question. She handed it to Jill.

"Right... Thank you Lizzie. Erm can I ask why?"

"She got married you see. She used to be a Sutcliffe, now she's Graham. I keep her under Sutcliffe so I know where she is."

"Right..." Lizzie's logic was baffling. She quickly flicked through the file, replaced it and turned away, about to make her way to her office when Lizzie called to her.

"I almost forgot! I think it's a card, it's somewhere in here... Dropped off for you earlier."

"Did you recognise who gave it to you?" Jill immediately asked. She was becoming edgy, a mixture of hope that there may be a description of the man, and fear that he'd been in the hospital, so near Gordon.

"No, sorry doctor." She spent another few seconds rummaging around before pulling out the card with a triumphant exclamation. "Here it is!"

"Thanks." She took it off Lizzie tore open the envelope shakily. A glance at the name sparked nothing in her memory. She turned her attention to the receptionist, reattaining her attention. "What did this person look like Lizzie?"

"It was a he. But I can't remember. It's been manic here this morning! Patients here there and everywhere. And Ken and Alun on top of that-" She immediately cut herself off, looking guilty as if she'd been about to reveal something she shouldn't. But Jill wasn't interested. She thanked Lizzie quietly before walking to her office, glancing up the corridor on the way in the vain hope that Gordon was coming towards her. She had two names, two possible clues to ending their nightmare, to keeping Gordon safe.

* * *

A knock on the door came as a welcome interruption to the mountain of paperwork Jill was trawling through, even more welcome as her husband entered her office. He closed the door and lowered himself in the seat she indicated, kissing her cheek as he did so. She finished the sentence she was writing, replaced the cap on her fountain pen and laid it down. She turned to face him fully. It was the first time she had chance to speak to him since that morning, aside from brief smiles and greetings between patients, there had been no time. Gordon came back from the accident and straight into casualty whilst Jill saw a few of his patients, they he joined them in evening surgery, by which time they were running late.

"Sorry I wasn't available at lunchtime love. Do you want to go through the cards now?"

"I've already done it. Lizzie helped. Her filing system does baffle me sometimes."

Gordon returned her knowing grin. He hated to think what would happen if Lizzie should leave; her poor replacement would have to spend the first few months rearranging the filing cabinets.

"There are two possibilities." Jill continued. "Ian Holbert, and Jane Kerry. Her card was dropped off here by a man."

"I don't recognise his name, but Jane Kerry rings a bell. I can't think why though. What about the other one we had this morning? Hannah Graham?"

"One of Jeff's patients. Though she's only seen him once so I don't know why she sent a card. She used to be Sutcliffe though if that's any help."

"Hannah Sutcliffe... Oh of course! Hannah!"

Whilst Gordon's expression turned to one of realisation, Jill merely stared at him, perplexed, when he didn't elaborate. "And she is...?" She eventually had to ask.

"A friend I met whilst at university. We dated for a while but she had to move away. So she's actually in Elsinby?"

"It seems so." She nodded.

"Under the circumstances I think I had better go and see her to explain. I'll go this evening."

"Alright but don't be too long eh. I thought we could spend one last quiet evening together before the children come back."

"That sounds like something to look forward to." He rose and leant down, placing his lips on hers in a gentle kiss. "I'll get going, make that evening last as long as possible." He kissed her again, this one lingering, his effort to leave quickly obviously not what he wanted to happen. Eventually he pulled back, and left her with one final kiss to her forehead.

She stared after him with a smile lingering on her lips. She still had to inform the police of the cards, and phone the local paper to correct the mistake, but decided to leave them until the morning. She was determined to try and forget about it all for the evening and just enjoy the company of her husband. Aside from that, with Gordon going to collect the children the following day, she knew she would need as many tasks to occupy her time as possible over the weekend, until he was home and safe.


	22. Chapter 22

She glanced at the clock above the mantel piece for the countless time. Dinner was prepared ready to be put in the oven, the table at the other end of the room in which she was sitting was set with candles waiting to be lit to create a romantic atmosphere, the remaining paperwork from her day had been completed. All she had to do was wait.

It wasn't late. It wasn't even that long since they'd parted at the hospital; he to Hannah's house and she to their home. Still, she couldn't help feeling increasing anxious as the minutes ticked by, a feeling that was becoming increasingly familiar when Gordon wasn't within the same building.

She wondered where he was. Was he having a nice reunion with Hannah? She hoped meeting an old friend was one good thing to come out of the whole torturous experience. Was he driving back home. Was he safe?

She glanced at the clock again, sighing as she realised not even a minute had passed since she'd last checked. She glanced at the book on the coffee-table but dismissed it. She'd tried that, tried her medical journal, tried watching television, but she was too on edge. Any noise made her lose attention, hoping it would be Gordon's car drawing into their driveway, but every time she was disappointed whilst the worry built.

* * *

"Gordon." She breathed his name as she heard the familiar sound of a key being slid into a lock of their front door. She practically flew into the hallway, restraining herself at the last moment so Gordon wouldn't suspect anything amiss.

"Hi love." He closed the door then proceeded to remove his coat and hang it up on the stand to his left. He bent to untie his shoes, picking them up and placing them inside the cupboard under the stairs along with his doctor's bag which belonged next to Jill's. She watched these actions, the familiarity of them serving to settle her and disperse the anxious feeling that had been plaguing her all evening.

"Have a nice time?" She questioned, walking with him into the kitchen.

"I did." It was his turn to watch her as she set about placing their dinner in the oven. "It was... weird... to see her again though. In some ways she's changed, but some aspects of her are exactly as she was all those years ago."

She glanced at him from her crouched position in front of the oven. "How did she take seeing you again?"

"Well she was a little shocked at first, since I'm not actually dead." He winced as he saw Jill flinch at his words. "It took a bit of explaining but she understands now I think. After that we just had a nice couple of hours catching up. I invited her to dinner next week. Is that okay?"

"Of course." She stood and pushed the oven door shut. "Dinner should be about twenty minutes. Want to go through to the living room?"

He nodded, rising from his place in one of the kitchen chairs. She followed him out the kitchen, grabbing the box of matches from the counter top as she passed.

Gordon relaxed into one of the settees whilst Jill lit the candles on the table. She flicked off the ceiling light leaving the illumination of the room to the candles. Their glow just reached Gordon. "You didn't want to read or anything did you?"

"No, I'm perfectly content here. At least I will be when you join me."

She needed no further invitation to sit beside him, happily letting him tug her to rest against him. She sighed contentedly as he enveloped her in his arms. The last of her worries left her. He was there, beside her, safe. That was all that mattered. She refused to think of the long drive he would be undertaking the following day and of the whole weekend he would be away from her.

Gordon looked down at her, smiling gently as her body relaxed considerably against him. He had seen the tension when he'd arrived home, accompanied by the worry on her face, and though her conversation was natural, he could tell she was on edge. She was still overly tense when she sat next to him, prompting him to draw her into a hug, hoping the affection from him would relax her. It happened he was right.

He knew she was still struggling with what had happened. He had seen the change in her demeanour; her increased alertness when out and about, her eagerness when he arrived back home or at the hospital. He understood though he wished it hadn't affected her so.

He moved his hand from her back to her hair, running his fingers through the silky strands. She moaned softly with contentment and his smile widened. Her moan was quickly followed by a groan as she looked at her watch. "Dinner's ready." She rose reluctantly. "You sit at the table and I'll bring it through."

He did as she said. It wasn't long before she returned, two plates of delicious smelling food in her hands. It tasted as delicious as it smelt, though it wasn't the food that captured most of his attention.

"What?" Jill asked bemusedly as she caught him staring at her for the sixth time.

"Nothing... I was just thinking how beautiful you look." It was true, he always thought his wife looked beautiful but the candlelight gave an extra softness meaning he could barely draw himself to tear his eyes from her since she'd sat before him.

Despite the dim light, the blush was visible in her cheeks. "Well... thank you..." The embarrassment was evident in her tone, but she smiled nonetheless.

He took her hand, leaning forward and placing his other hand on her cheek. He leaned forward further, using his hand to guide her face towards his until his lips met hers. The kiss was one of such tenderness, showing her his love for her, lingering for a moment before they both pulled away though he kept his fingers on her cheek. He stroked her skin softly, gazing into her eyes, so very happy to see some of the familiar sparkle returning to them.


	23. Chapter 23

She watched his movements from her position on the bed. He placed a folded shirt in the suitcase next to her, looking over and catching her eye, smiling at how perfectly comfortable she looked with the duvet pulled up to her chin.

She returned his smile, albeit a little weakly. He noted her increasingly nervous demeanour, the way her smile was getting more and more strained as the morning progressed, her increased alertness and the way her eyes followed him round the room. He chose to remain silent; any comment from him would only result in vehement denial by her and a strain to their current comfortable silence. Instead, he placed a knee beside his suitcase resting on his side of the bed, balancing himself as he leant over and placed a soft kiss to his wife's cheek. He was rewarded with a broader smile, this time more natural.

She raised a hand from beneath the warmth of the duvet, placing it on his cheek and trailing it down to his chin, her thumb tracing gently across his bottom lip, feeling his warm breaths hitting her skin, and the contrast of his soft lip to the rough stubble of his chin beneath her fingers. As she carried out this action, her eyes quickly became distant, the smile dropped into a thin line of concentration.

He stayed still, allowing her to trace his face for a few moments, enjoying the sensation, though becoming increasingly worried at the dulling expression on his wife's face. Eventually, he captured her hand, moving it from his cheek and briefly placing his lips on the backs of her fingers. He raised his eyes to meet hers, relieved to see some brightness returning as he drew her back to the present.

"Don't forget your pyjamas." She said quietly after some silence.

He eased himself from the bed, took a clean pair of pyjamas from the chest of drawers and placed them still neatly folded inside the suitcase. "Anything else?"

It was his turn to take in her face as she gazed with concentration at the wall over his shoulder. Eventually she shook her head. "Nothing you can pack right now."

He nodded, flipping the lid over the suitcase though not drawing the zip. "Breakfast?"

"I'll come down."

She slipped out from the bed as he left the room, and entered the kitchen soon after him, sitting down at the table and pulling her dressing gown tighter around her.

"You look like you could fall asleep sitting there."

"I think I could." She replied, smiling as he soon placed a mug of steaming coffee in front of her.

He moved around the kitchen for a few more minutes, carrying bowls and plates, knives and spoons, cereal, condiments and milk to the table. She took to watching him again, committing every movement to memory, all the while fighting to maintain her composure in an attempt to avoid alerting him to anything amiss.


	24. Chapter 24

"I think that's everything." He glanced over at her as he closed the lid of the suitcase, pressing hard until a click told him the metal clips were secure.

She rose from her position on the chair by the window as he lifted the suitcase from the bed and followed him downstairs, stopping at the foot of them. Her gaze followed his movements to and from the cupboard under the stairs, the deft movement of his fingers tying his shoe laces and then the familiar movement of his body as he slid into his coat. She moved forward then, straightened the lapels of his mac before placing her hands gently on his cheeks. They gazed silently at each other for a long moment until she finally spoke, her voice quiet, though steady despite the emotions she was holding at bay.

"You have a nice time. Enjoy yourself. Say hi to your parents from me." She moved her thumb back and forth against his cheek gently.

"Will do." He replied, turning his head to allow him to place a kiss to the palm of her hand.

She smiled softly at the sensation. After allowing his lips to linger there, she slid her fingers to his jaw, exerting a gentle pressure to turn his head a fraction, allowing her lips easier access to his. He happily obliged. His hands moved, sliding beneath her suit jacket to hold her firmly at her waist with the thin cotton of her blouse the only barrier between him and her skin. At the same time, her arms looped round his neck as she pressed herself close to him.

The kiss ended gently, both relinquishing the other's lips at the same time, though neither willing to break the closeness. Their foreheads rested gently together. His eyes were trained to her face while hers were lowered, her gaze resting on his chest.

"I'll only be gone for a couple of days Jill." He murmured.

She nodded, moving her head to rest on his shoulder, her face pressed against her neck.

He slid his hands from her waist to her back, tightening his arms around her as he released a sigh.

"I have to go now Jill. And you have to get ready for work."

She nodded, loosening her arms around him only a fraction, wanting to make the moment last as long as possible.

He released a heavy sigh, the sound harsh even to his own ears. "Jill, stop this, now. Let go."

At his tone, she immediately sprang away from him, putting a fair distance between them. She rapidly blinked back the tears, feeling foolish and embarrassed at her actions. Jill Weatherill was never clingy! He had every right to be angry with her.

"Sorry, sorry. I'm sorry." She released rapidly, at the same time as he softly uttered her name.

"Jill." He said again. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have spoken to you like that. I didn't mean it."

"It's fine." She shrugged, ignoring the hand he held out to her. "I don't know what came over me. Let's just forget about it, yes?"

* * *

He sighed as he drove away from his house, wondering if he should have addressed the issue before he left, though he knew it wouldn't be a conversation that could be had in a few minutes halfway out the door.

She was obviously reluctant for him to leave. In fact, the more he thought about it, the more he realised she been reluctant to let him out of her sight all week. He sighed again, realising he definitely should have spoken to her well before that morning.


	25. Chapter 25

"She's so clingy Mum. If someone asked me a week ago if I thought Doctor Weatherill could be like this, I would say no. But now..." He sighed, dropping his head to gaze at the floor, the familiar living room carpet of his childhood home seemingly capturing his attention.

"She is human Gordon. It's natural this would have had an effect on her. I'd be more worried if she was bottling her emotions up."

"But that's just it!" He exclaimed. "I think she is bottling things up. There have been tears, of course. But tears are when things have happened, taking her by surprise. The rest of the time, she seems distant... but... clingy at the same time."

Betty Ormerod moved to lay an arm across her son's back. "Just be patient. Let her know you're there for her, and that you're willing to listen when she wants to talk."

Gordon nodded. A feeling of guilt welled up inside of him as he recalled how he'd not been patient, how he'd shouted at Jill that morning. He'd rung her to tell her he'd arrived in Bournemouth. The conversation had been stilted. Her tone had been polite, kind even, but there had been something else, and only then, speaking to his mother could he find a word for it; wary. She'd been wary as she spoke, her words deliberate and carefully chosen, as if afraid he'd speak harshly to her again. It was no use phoning her again, the issue would have to be addressed face-to-face. He released a heavy sigh and turned to face his mother. "I know I've only just arrived... But would you mind if I took the children back home tomorrow. I'm not keen on leaving Jill for too long."

"Of course not." Betty smiled with sympathy. "Although I suspect if she's that het up about you driving, if would be better if you don't tell her you're coming home early."

"I think you're right. Thanks Mum, it's helped to talk it over."

"You're welcome. Now, since you've got a long drive ahead of you, don't you think you should be heading up to bed? You'll need a good night's sleep."

Gordon smiled, memories of his childhood flooding back. "Of course Mum. Goodnight." He kissed her cheek then made his way up to the room that had been his for the first 22 years of his life. Despite his Mum's words, he knew sleep would not come immediately. He had to think long and hard about how he'd address the issues he'd been so long avoiding with Jill.

* * *

She sat in the living room, staring blankly at the orange wall opposite her, not even dwelling on how garish and awful she thought it was. Normally, she would have welcomed an empty house. She was able to read from cover to cover the latest issue of the _Lancet_, or pick out the medical articles from the new _Nature_. But, now, she had no concentration for those things. She'd picked up the journal, opening it to an article she'd marked as being of particular interest. But her attention had drifted, her thoughts taken up by one thing; Gordon.

It was Sunday, he wasn't due back until the following day. Still, she couldn't help but feel an all-consuming worry about the drive he was to take. It was only a week ago that her world had fallen apart, albeit for only a few hours. She couldn't bear the thought that this time, it could be permanent.

She hated to admit to herself that she'd been a wreck after Gordon had left for Bournemouth. He'd rung the house to tell her he'd arrived, thus easing her worry somewhat, though the conversation had been incredibly stilted.

Remembering that conversation made Jill think back to how she'd acted before he'd left. Her actions had been pathetic, embarrassing. She'd tried to apologise over the telephone, but the shame still too raw. Instead of uttering the five letter word, she chose to end the phone call. The atmosphere between them remained strained.

Suddenly angry, Jill rose from the settee, straitening her spine and raising her head. She hated what she'd become in a week, she hated herself, she hated her actions. She was determined to do something about it. She marched into the study and settled herself behind the large oak desk. She opened the Lancet, uncapped a fountain pen and began to underline the article, filling the margins with copious notes in her swirling handwriting. There was no way she was going to allow herself to lounge around pathetically.

Work had been her sanctuary before, there was no reason why it couldn't be again.


	26. Chapter 26

Her head shot up. The noise of metal sliding against metal met her ears. But it couldn't be. Unless... Cold fear swept through her. She quickly rose from the desk, treading slowly over the thick carpet out into the hallway and into the kitchen, opening the back door to provide some form of escape if needed. At the same time, the ill-fitted front door scraped against its frame.

She looked around for something, anything that could be used as some type of weapon. Her gaze finally settled on the ornament on the telephone table. She seized it, whirling round to face the intruder. But what met her gaze made her pause.

"Gordon thank goodness!" She finally exclaimed, having taken a moment to register the three people standing in front of her. She bent down, placing the ornament on the floor beside her, and enveloped Katie and Tom in a tight hug as they ran to her. They garbled excitedly at her, all their adventures of the week gushing forth in a barely coherent stream.

She glanced up. Gordon had his back to her, hanging up his coat. He turned back, catching her gaze. She knew he'd noticed her strange behaviour, the ornament, but he stayed silent. She returned her attention to the children, forcing her breathing to calm in an attempt slow her heart rate so as not to alert them to anything amiss.

She finally coaxed Tom and Katie to let her stand and move through to the living room, where she could more comfortably listen to their stories from the settee. Tom settled on one side of her, Katie the other, meaning she often had a different story going in each ear. Gordon followed them in, standing behind the armchair and leaning on the back with folded arms. She looked up at him when the children paused to take a breath. "Why are you home so early? I wasn't expecting you until tomorrow."

"I thought it would be for the best." He gave her a level gaze. She knew exactly what he meant.

A familiar pang of guilt swept through her; knowing she had cut his trip short. "But what about your Mum?"

"She's fine with it. She thought it was the best thing to do too."

Jill nodded, then dropped her gaze once more to the children. She hated the unfamiliar stiltedness that had taken over their conversation. Nine years of friendship, and nearly a year of marriage gave Jill the ability to read her Gordon, yet now, she couldn't decipher his feelings towards her. They rarely argued, aside from the occasional professional disagreement, and certainly never to the extent when they would fall out for any length of time. They needed to talk, she knew this. Yet she hadn't a clue what to say to dispel the tension. She didn't even know if Gordon would be receptive to a conversation.

"Have you anything planned for dinner?"

Gordon's question interrupted her thoughts. She was glad of the neutrality of the question, not that they could discuss anything of importance with the children present. "Not really, why?"

"How about fish and chips on the sea front? Then let these two have a run on the beach. They had far too much energy sitting in the car all day." His last sentence almost didn't reach Jill's ears as Tom and Katie let out a loud cheer at the prospect of the evening's activities.

Letting the children have a run and a play would allow Gordon and herself a little time to talk out of Tom and Katie's earshot. It seemed he was as willing to sort everything out as she was. She flashed him a smile over Tom's head. He returned the gesture. They were somewhat polite and sad smiles, but it was a start.


	27. Chapter 27

"I am sorry Jill. I should never have spoken to you like that."

She shrugged and focused on picking her way over the sand. "And I shouldn't have been so..." She raised a hand to sweep away the hair that the wind had blown in her face. She glanced at him. "Let's just forget about it, eh?"

"Jill..." He sighed, reaching out and touching her elbow, slightly dismayed as she moved away from his hand.

"It's all in the past now. I'm over it."

He watched as she straightened her spine, lifted her head and turned and gave him a level gaze.

"Okay?"

Gordon nodded mutely, not liking the hardness in her expression. Jill on the other hand fought hard to sustain it. They walked on together in silence, towards the children playing near the edge of the sea. The glanced over at him. She wanted so much to reach out and slide her hand into his, but she worried it might be construed as an indication of weakness. Her hands stayed firmly at her sides.

She glanced around the beach. The sea was out, creating a vast expanse of sand. There were few other occupants; a family behind them, a couple leant against the sea wall, and a solitary man. A jolt passed through Jill. He was tall, well-built. He was coming in their direction. "TOM! KATIE!" She shouted, making her voice heard clearly despite the distance between them, and the ever growing wind. "Come on! It's time to go."

The 'awww's of the children were, too, clearly audible. The disappointment on their faces was all too apparent as they neared their father and step-mother. Jill ignored Gordon's questioning expression, instead thrusting her shoes at Gordon and grabbing Katie's hand. She reached out to Tom but he turned away. "It's not fair! I want to stay!" He made to run back towards the sea, but Jill's hand darted out quickly, her fingers curling around his wrist in a firm, but not painful, hold.

"Come on Gordon!" She marched up the beach, making Tom and Katie run to keep up with her long strides. A glance to her right made her satisfied that Gordon was with them. "Come on, shoes on." She chivvied as soon as they reached the concrete ramp leading from the beach up to the road. "And don't take all day about it." She added upon seeing Gordon, Tom and Katie seemingly attempt to remove every last grain of sand from their feet.

"But I've got sand between my toes." Katie whined.

"You'll survive, come on." Jill near enough snapped back.

"Jill..." Gordon said quietly, a warning tone to his voice. She shot him a glare, prompting him to quietly help the children quickly into their shoes. As Jill once more marched on with the children in tow, he gazed after her worriedly. He knew her well enough to see the fear through her angry expression. Before the event of only a week earlier, it had been an expression he'd seen only very few times. Now... Fear was an almost permanent fixture upon his wife's face.


	28. Chapter 28

"What was all that about earlier?"

"Hmm?" She didn't glance up from the journal article, pretending she had no idea what he was talking about.

"At the beach." He prompted. He turned more fully to face her in his position at the opposite end of the settee.

She flipped over a page of the journal, hoping to give off an air of nonchalance. "Nothing happened at the beach."

"Oh come off it Jill!"

Any pretence of normalcy was broken when his sharp tone reached her. She blinked back the tears, determined not to give in to weakness, and forced her voice to steady. "I really don't know what you're talking about Gordon." She was playing a dangerous game, she knew it; Gordon was angry, yet she couldn't bring herself to admit to him, let alone herself, just how scared she'd been on the beach.

"You know what I'm talking about."

His voice was incredibly hard, yet she still pretended to read her journal article.

"How can you sit there and ignore me? Why can't you let me in?" His shout resounded around the room, ringing off the glass-wear long after he had fallen silent. He sat glaring at his wife, his chest heaving, waiting for some show of emotion. He forced his voice to quiet, mindful of the children asleep upstairs. "What's wrong with you? Why can't you be normal and admit when things are bothering you? I knew you were tough when I married you, but this..."

She didn't take her eyes off the paper, yet she absorbed every word. To know that he felt that way about her... That he wanted her to change... to be 'normal'. The pressure of tears was becoming too much, she trembled as she fought to hold them in.

"I don't think I can love this new you." Gordon continued quietly, uttering the words which finally made Jill snap.

"I thought I saw him!" She shouted, whipping her head up to meet her husband's glare.

"The policeman?" Gordon whispered after a long moment of silence.

She nodded, quickly brushing away a tear that had appeared at the corner of her eye. Gordon moved towards her, but she stood up abruptly, surprising him. "I'm going to bed." Her voice was bitter, and she didn't look at him as she stalked out the room.

Gordon stayed in the living room for some time, a sigh escaping him every once in a while, as he tried to figure out just what to do to deal with the mess their lives had become.

Jill meanwhile perched upon the edge of the bath behind the locked bathroom door, breathing deeply, fists clenched, nails digging deeply into the palms of her hands, as she forced herself to gain control of her emotions. She felt sure that someone out there wanted to hurt Gordon, to take him away from her. Little did he know he was succeeding, but in a completely different way.


	29. Chapter 29

"Morning Lizzie, Ken!" Gordon called, attempting false joviality as he entered reception, seconds after his wife. As they both stood there, watching Lizzie rifling through pile of papers for their notes, he shot her a sideways glance. They hadn't spoken since she'd left the living room the night before. He'd eventually made his way up to bed, only to find Jill asleep, or at least pretending to be. He was too much of a coward to awake her, convincing himself she needed the sleep, needed sleep more than she needed to hear an apology from him. And he did need to apologise. He was incredibly ashamed at how he'd spoken to her. Only the day after telling his mother than he would be more patient, he'd done the exact opposite. He'd practically told her he didn't love her anymore!

"Here you are doctors." Lizzie's voice broke through his thoughts, and he took the offered pile of brown folders, containing morning surgery's patient notes. Judging by the size of the piles, the morning was going to be a lengthy one. He echoed Jill's 'thanks' and began to turn towards his consulting room, when Lizzie stopped them. "Doctor Weatherill, you don't have the spare key to your office do you?"

"No. Why?"

Fear began to set in Lizzie's expression. "Because it's not here." She gestured to the box set upon the wall behind her, housing the spare keys for the entire hospital. The hook which normally held Jill's key was empty. "The box was open when I came in. But I'm sure I locked it up last night."

Everyone looked dubious at Lizzie's comment, knowing the occasional forgetfulness of the receptionist. Jill, however, looked worried. She peered at the wooden case; something didn't look right. "It doesn't look like it's been forced open to you?"

Ken took a step forward, examining the box silently for a few seconds before his fingers went up to trace a scratched area. "I'm afraid it looks that way."

Jill shot a glance at Gordon, before striding towards her office, fighting to hide the fear that was building inside of her. Three further sets of footfalls followed her. She reached a hand out, noting a trembling she could not control, and curled her fingers around the cool brass handle. She depressed it, feeling no resistance, and pushed forwards, the unlocked door opening to reveal her room. The sight that met her eyes registered straight away. Nevertheless, she took a couple of steps into the office before she stopped. Her position allowed her to survey every corner of the room, and to see Lizzie, Ken and Gordon clustered in the doorway, shock written on their faces.

"I'll phone the police!" Lizzie exclaimed, turned on her heel and dashed back the way she had come. They could hear her urgent tones as they continued to take in the state of the usually immaculate office.

The chairs were overturned, the desk drawers pulled out, their contents strewn across the room, the mirror above the sink smashed. Medical text books and journals scattered the room, various pages torn or ripped out altogether. There was a rip running the length of the fabric covering the examining bed at the end of the office, the stuffing pulled out in fistful's and left to fall to the floor.

And then her eyes caught a particular object. There on the floor was the picture of herself and Gordon on her wedding day. She knew it well, it usually resided on her desk. It had been taken after the ceremony, she was dressed in her white suit, he in a dark trousers and jacket. They were in front of their house, the gate open, allowing them to stand underneath the pergola, the white petals of the rose framing them as they enveloped each other in their arms. The stark contrast to their current relationship didn't fail to hit Jill, despite the circumstances.

Jill turned her back on the doorway where Gordon and Ken still stood, crossing her arms around herself defensively. The amount of effort and malice that had gone into the destruction of her office was what struck Jill most.

Gordon slowly stepped up behind her, reached out and tentatively slid his arms around her waist. She didn't relax, nor did she pull away. He gently pulled her closer, encasing her with her back pressed against his chest, and his arms holding her firm at her stomach. He dipped his head a fraction, placing his cheek to hers, their temples touching lightly. Her strong and rapid heartbeat was evident with his arm against her ribcage, her deep and shaky breathing moving her diaphragm against him.


	30. Chapter 30

"What's going on here?" Matron stepped into the doorway. "Oh my..." She looked sadly at the two doctors, Jill still encased in Gordon's arms.

"Someone nicked the key." Ken provided. "We reckon as it happened last night. My Lizzie's phoning the bobbies."

As if on cue, his daughter ran unsteadily in her high heels to the open doorway. "The police are on their way. They said not to touch anything." Lizzie took a tentative step into the room. "Why would someone do this? It's terrible!" She shuddered. "You don't think it's the same man that told you Doctor Ormerod was dead do you?"

"I think it is." Jill replied, her voice thick with emotion. "It can't have been anyone else, could it?" She tipped her head to glance at Gordon, then at Lizzie, Matron and Ken, as if hoping they'd give her the answer she needed.

"Probably not." Gordon tightened his hold on her, relived at last to feel her volunteering some contact between them as she placed her hands on his lower arms.

"Right, let's leave the doctors alone. We still have to do our jobs." Matron, ever calm in a crisis instructed. "Lizzie, if you could split Doctor Weatherill's patients between Doctors Ormerod and Goodwin."

"Right you are Matron." The receptionist turned to make her way through the doorway, but came to a stop as Jill spoke up, causing her to teeter unsteadily in her lemon yellow stilettos.

"I'm fine Matron. I'll be taking morning surgery."

"I was merely referring to the fact that you can't see patients in this office."

The female doctor shrugged. "Mr Harper's away isn't he? I'll use his office; while the cat's away and all that."

"Very well. Kenneth," Matron turned to the porter. "Will you and Alun prepare the office ASAP?"

"I think there's a spare examining bed in the basement. Will that be needed?"

Whilst Matron instructed Ken on giving the examining bed a proper scrub down, Jill allowed her gaze to wander once more around her office. It didn't make sense; all the things that had happened, there was no similarity. The first incidents appeared to be calculated attacks on her emotions. But the destruction of her office... There was such an air of anger, of hated. She struggled to think why anyone would do all this to her, who would do it.

She heaved a heavy sigh, prompting Gordon to tighten his arms around her. "Are you sure you're alright to work sweetheart?"

"I'm fine." She replied immediately, some irritability creeping into her tone. "I said I was." She continued, her tone becoming even more frosty, and despite Gordon's efforts to the contrary, she stepped out of his arms. With a distance reinstated between them, she crossed her arms in front of herself, her stance clearly defensive. She turned her head from Gordon, her attention tuned to the end of Ken and Matron's conversation.

"Quick as you can please Ken, morning surgery starts in a couple of minutes."

"Yes Matron." Thus instructed on preparing Mr Harper's office, Ken left the office, closely followed by Lizzie.


	31. Chapter 31

Patient files lay to her right, the clock was ticking, the sounds of the clamour in reception reached her ears. Yet, she sat unmoving, the heels of her hands pressed to the lids of her closed eyes, forcing back the tears she knew were imminent.

Gordon obviously didn't hold any confidence, and belief in her. He constantly questioned whether she could cope. Even then, in her office, she said she was fine to carry on the morning as normal, yet he still insisted on doubting her. And then his words from the night before... Wanting to know what was 'wrong' with her. But not wrong in an emotional way, but wrong in a fundamental sense. He thought she was 'wrong' to the very core of her being, she wasn't 'right'. He'd said she wasn't 'normal', if there ever was such a thing, yet he wished she was. And, the most devastating thing of all, he'd told her he didn't think he could love her anymore.

She was fast losing everything because of the mystery person who kept plaguing their lives. Yet could she completely blame him? She didn't believe she changed so much. Perhaps Gordon was only just realising who she really was.

* * *

The police arrived at the hospital mid-morning. They inspected the office, interviewed Jill once again, and asked some of the hospital staff questions. They finished, however, saying there was not a lot to go on. There were no sightings of whoever had caused such destruction. Neither Jill nor Gordon were surprised the intruder had gone about his attack unheard. The part of the hospital where the offices were situated was usually deserted at night; any activity would be situated in the wards or casualty.

In addition, the fingerprints were none conclusive; the amount of people passing through Jill's office- staff, patients, visitors- made it difficult to discern the prints of someone who had permission to be in there, from someone who didn't. And besides, they had cautioned, the intruder had likely been careful to cover his tracks.

And so it was that Jill left the hospital that evening with less hope than ever before that her tormentor would be caught. Her office was still a mess. She'd spent sometime during her lunch break tidying it, salvaging what she would, but being forced to throw away a great deal. Ken and Alun had disposed of the examination bed for her. The one they'd brought up from the basement would serve as her new one. Some of the books were replaceable, as was the mirror and her desk chair. The painting from her wall, however, was not, and neither were the ornaments on her desk that some of her patients had given her.

Gordon had caught her as she left the hospital, gently reminding her that he had agreed to go out for a quick drink with Jeff, though offering to cancel if she'd prefer. Jill, of course, had refused, biting back with more force than she had intended that she didn't need him to babysit her.

So she arrived at home alone at around seven o'clock, relieved the nanny, cooked for herself and ate whilst helping the children with their homework, and spent some time with them before putting them to bed. She then cleaned the kitchen, scrubbing more vigorously at the work tops than usual, for once glad of the distraction it provided her; normally there was nothing more she hated after a long day at work than it being her turn to do the weekly clean of the kitchen or bathroom. She glanced frequently at her watch, seeing the minutes tick away until yet another hour passed. Her worry, which or course was unusually heightened since the threats was turning into panic. Gordon had said it would be a quick drink, yet it had gone midnight and still he hadn't returned.


	32. Chapter 32

"Where on Earth have you been?!"

At such an attack of angry words as he stepped through the doors, Gordon instinctively began to react defensively. But looking at his wife's face, he paused, took a deep breath, and forced himself to respond calmly. "I went out for a drink with Jeff."

"You could have called me! I've been sitting here, waiting for you!"

"I lost track of time. I'm sorry." He glanced at his watch, wincing at the time; it was much later than he'd thought. "I am sorry." He looked back at Jill, seeing the tears that had gathered in her eyes, held back only through grim determination on her part. The sight made his breath catch, as a surge of love suddenly took him by surprise. Here was not the anger of an over-bearing wife. Here was the fear of his Jill, who had stood strong with so much against her.

He moved swiftly forward then, sliding his arms around her waist. "I'm so sorry my darling." Eventually, after a few seconds of hesitation, she returned the embrace.

He shifted, an arm tightening around her waist, the other moving down behind her knees. With a swift motion, he scooped her up. She made a small noise of surprise, her arms tightening around his neck. He carried her the short distance through the doorway and into the living room, setting them both down on the settee. He supported her with an arm around her back, whilst her legs lay over his, her feet resting on the cushions the other side of him.

"I'm sorry about what I said." He sighed, after a few moments of silence. "I do love you, nothing can change that. I'm just worried about you, and I wish you'd admit when something's wrong-. Jill!" He cut himself off, and tightened his arms around her as she attempted to escape from his lap. "It was wrong of me to try and force you. I just want you to know that I'm here for you, alright?"

She nodded after a long pause, obviously reluctant to agree, seeing it as a sign of weakness even to merely agree that she knew she could rely on someone should she choose to.

"Can we talk about what happened at the beach?" He frowned a little when she tensed, but she didn't go straight into denial as before, so he assumed some progress had been made. "Sweetheart?" He prompted gently when she remained silent. "You said you saw him?"

Slowly, she nodded, huddling down further where she sat.

"Are you sure?"

"I think so." She nodded again. Gordon had to bend his head closer to her, in order to hear her quiet mumbles. "I wasn't sure, but I couldn't take the risk."

He placed a kiss to her forehead before speaking. This was the most revealing she'd been about it all, and he hoped she wasn't about to clam up. "Could you give the police a better description now do you think?"

"He was quite a distance away, and the sun was behind him so he was practically a silhouette. I don't know. Something, his build I suppose, just seemed to trigger in my memory." At the last word, she sniffed, blinking back the tears that had formed.

He nodded understandingly, holding her a little tighter, formulating his next words carefully; he didn't want to sound accusatory. "Why didn't you tell me Sweetheart, when you saw him?"

"I didn't want to worry you." She shrugged, her voice quieting even more, so Gordon had to shift her in his arms to allow him hear her. He tilted his head closer to hers so he could feel her stilted breaths against his cheek as she spoke. "And I just had to get you off that beach, just in case…"

He didn't speak, couldn't find the words to address such fear. He merely held her tighter, pressing his lips to the top of her head, hoping he could make her feel at least a little safer and relaxed.

His words the night before were desperately regretted; how could he dismiss her fears with such ease, and belittle her as well? He hoped she'd believed his apology, and that he did love her, despite what he said. Just to be sure, he whispered the sentiment into her hair.


	33. Chapter 33

The morning came along far too quickly. Jill and Gordon had slept in each other's arms, ate breakfast with the children and arrived at work together. Their time was spent much more amiably than the previous morning. There were smiles as they walked the narrow path up to hospital. Gordon placed a hand on the small of her back, leading her through the door in front of him. They stood close as they waited for Lizzie to finish with a phone call.

The conversation the night before had been much needed. He now seemed to understand some of her reasons for her actions, and some of her fears. She felt much more at ease with him. She felt much more confident in their relationship.

"Morning Doctors!"

Lizzie's bright greeting drew them from their own little world. "Morning Lizzie." Gordon grinned whilst Jill smiled and nodded, composing a more professional expression on her face.

"How are you this morning Doctor Weatherill?"

"I'm fine. Thank you Lizzie," she added, seeing the question for what it was; concern, not as something to be used for later gossip.

Gordon flicked his eyes to his wife, noting her composure, her poise as she stood straight in immaculate clothes and high heels. Anyone would still be shaken and more than a little nervous at entering the building after the shock of the previous morning. Jill, however, showed none of this. And Gordon felt a surge of admiration; he was so proud of her. He hoped she knew this.

"Thank you Lizzie."

Gordon's gaze moved to Jill's lips as she spoke. He caught a glimpse of the tip of her tongue as she pronounced the 'th' with perfect elocution.

"Doctor Ormerod, Doctor O, Doctor. Doctor Ormerod!"

Lizzie's shout, accompanied by a sharp jab of Jill's elbow to his ribs startled him into awareness of his surroundings once more. The surroundings that contained things he should be concentrating on more than concentrating on his wife. He smiled sheepishly at Lizzie, took his patient files and proceeded on a slow walk to Jill's office door. He couldn't understand why his feelings for Jill were especially strong at that moment. Perhaps it was just after the emotions of last night. He shrugged. Whatever the reason, he didn't mind; he was just glad she seemed to have forgiven his stupidity and insensitivity towards her.

He leant in and placed a kiss to her cheek, leaving her to unlock her office door. And how relieved she was when she felt the key engage with the lock and heard the mechanism sliding back. She would never had admitted it to anyone of course, but she had been a little worried that the morning before would repeat itself and she would find her door unlocked with destruction behind it. She depressed the brass handle, pushing the door inwards, and taking a step after it.

She looked up from her files. She stopped. A jolt hit her chest. A feeling of cold swept throughout her.


	34. Chapter 34

It was a clamour in the corridor which drew Gordon from his office. The curiosity turned to panic when he saw the commotion was caused by a number of staff members crowded around Jill's office door. "What's happened?" He ran the short distance between their offices and pushed through the crowd of people without waiting for a response, desperate to get to his wife. "Jill?" He touched her arm.

Jill merely remained silent, directing Gordon's gaze to the opposite side of her office. Her old examining bed had been removed the day before due to the irreparable damage. There had been a space ready for Ken and Alun to move in the new bed. However, the space was now filled. Gordon blood ran cold as he stared.

"He must still have the spare key," Jill whispered, her wide eyes flitting to Gordon.

A nod was all he could muster. She was trembling beneath his hand. He raised his free hand, capturing her fingers and entwining them with his own. His gaze never wavered from the sight before him. There, slumped on the floor was a joke shop dummy dressed in a suit not unlike the one Jill currently wore. Some sort of red liquid pooled around the figure's legs. It dripped down the once clean white blouse, coming from one spot on the left side of the chest, from which a knife protruded…

"I… I don't understand," he finally uttered to no one in particular; he didn't expect an answer.

"That red stuff, it's not blood is it?" Lizzie whispered from the doorway.

Jill shook her head, moving to crouch at the edge of the pool. She touched it gingerly with a fingertip. "I think it's paint. It's starting to dry already." She rose, turning to face the crowd gathered at the entrance to her office. "I just don't understand why he'd come back again."

"You don't think he left summat yesterday? You know, that would incriminate him. And decided to leave this while he was here?"

"The police would have found that yesterday, surely?" Meryl replied, frowning at Ken.

"Why would he risk coming back then?" Alun chipped in. "He might have been seen."

"Maybe he's working with someone. Someone who works here!"

"Lizzie!" Matron admonished. "That's enough speculation. Back to work I think. Leave Doctor Weatherill in peace." She shepherded the staff out of the office, pausing before leaving, her words directed at Jill. "I think it's best if you come to Mr Middleditch's office later. This needs sorting out."

Once the door closed behind the older woman, Jill turned to Gordon, though to his surprise, her expression held not fear or sadness, but anger. "How dare she? How dare she waltz in here and expect it all to be solved so easily. And suggest I'm the one in the wrong!"

"Come on Darling. She doesn't think that."

"Well that's what it sounds like." She crossed her arms across her chest. Knowing Jill for ten years, he understood this to be a defensive gesture. He suspected showing her anger towards Matron and letting it grow was easier for her than dealing with her fear.

He placed his hands on her upper arms, not letting her go when she tried to shrug him away. "Come on, don't be like that."

"Well how should I be Gordon, eh?"

"Alright, I'm sorry," he sighed, seeing that her anger was now directed at him. "I'm just struggling to understand. Everything previous to this… It suggests that I'm the one who would get hurt."

"Well who knows!" She threw her hands up in the air. "Maybe he's going to kill us all and be done with it!" She was fast becoming hysterical and she hated herself for it.

"Don't think like that. The police will figure out who's doing this, it won't come to that." His words were hollow, he knew it, and Jill knew for she didn't bother replying. The attempt at reassurance was as much for Gordon's own benefit as it was for hers.

They were silent then. Jill glanced back at the dummy, at the red liquid near her shoes. She stepped away, heaving a deep sigh. "I just don't understand… What have we done to deserve all this?"

And she looked at him, really looked at him, and through the tears in her eyes he could see the exhaustion of everything weighing down on her. He stepped forward then, sliding his arms around her waist, hoping she wouldn't pull away, and feeling relieved when her arms wrapped around his neck.

He held her tighter, a feeling of fear sweeping through him. Everything previously had been suggestive of him being the target, at least physically. But now… Contemplating that someone might be trying to hurt his wife… He began finally to understand the fear that had gripped Jill since it had all begun.


	35. Chapter 35

_I just want to apologise first to all the lovely people who have been reading my fics and writing such encouraging comments - I really do appreciate them! Due to being very busy, I have been very lax at posting fic recently. I will continue to be busy, but I will attempt to post more to my fics, though I doubt very much that it will be with any regularity. Thanks again, and hope today's posts make up at least a little for the lack of updates the past few months._

_AKJ4_

* * *

The police had come and gone, once again drawing no conclusions from the state of her office, though they took the dummy and the knife with them to examine further. They were also going to visit all the joke shops in the area; someone may recognise the dummy and remember who bought it. During what was meant to be her lunch break, Jill had been on her hands and knees with Alun, scrubbing the paint from the tiled floor.

It was whilst she was cleaning when there was a knock on her office door. "Come in!" She turned her head, allowing her to see her visitor from her crouched position.

"Hello Doctor." Ken Hopkirk stood a little uncomfortably in the doorway.

She rose to stand then, holding the wet stained cloth away from her clothes. "What can I do for you Ken?"

"Look, doctor, me cousin's a locksmith." He cleared his throat gruffly. "I don't know if it'll help none, but 'e can fit window locks for you. If I explain to him, I'm sure as he'll do it on the cheap for you."

"Really?" She pondered this a moment. Window locks would certainly make her feel safer at home despite their house not having been a target… yet. The last thought brought a resolute expression to her face. "Thanks Ken. Good idea, you can never be too careful can you?" She smiled gratefully.

"Mr Middleditch said he can do your lock here." He tapped her glossy white office door. "He's coming this afternoon if that's alright with you."

"Of course Ken… I really appreciate it."

"Well we all want to do want we can to help. It's a terrible business Doc."


	36. Chapter 36

The sound of the bell belonging to the church opposite the house rang out. Jill started, counting the chimes with her eyes closed. Midnight. She hardly dared believe it had been an entire hour since the sounds had last reached her. She didn't want to believe she'd spent the last hour sitting in the same position, not moving, only thinking. She opened her eyes and immediately squinted as they protested to the introduction of light. The free-standing lamp in the opposite corner of the room cast only a dim glow; her reaction to which was testament to the length of time she'd spent with eyes closed.

She released a heavy sigh and rose slowly from the chair. Her body protested like that of one twenty years her elder. She stretched gingerly, closing her eyes as every muscle seemed to respond with pain. With another sigh, she walked slowly across the room, switching off the lamp and plunging the room into darkness. She knew the house sufficiently well to pick her way across the room, stepping between the coffee table and the settee, turning left and making her way through the doorway. The rest of the house was in darkness, only two long rectangles of the hallway carpet were illuminated by the street light flooding through the two glass panes in the front door.

Jill tried the handle, noting it was locked, then turned and wearily began climbing the stairs, stretching to miss the squeaky fifth step. The doors to the children's rooms were ajar. She pushed both open a fraction; both occupants were sound asleep. The door to her own room was fully closed. The handle made no noise as she depressed it fully, releasing the door from its frame. The bottom of the door brushed the carpet though the noise was quieter than the breathing of her husband.

She stepped inside the room, pushing the door back to its frame, though this time forgetting to depress the handle. She winced as the door clicked into position. Gordon, however, appeared to be oblivious; his breathing continued steadily, a noise familiar and comforting to her after nearly a year of marriage.

She undressed quietly, and entered the adjoining bathroom, wincing as she stepped onto the cold floor tiles. The door closed, she switched on the light, allowing her to gaze uncomfortably at her reflection in the mirror above the sink. The situation was beginning to tell on her features; her eyes were held none of their customary brightness and were underlined by dark circles even make-up struggled to hide. She splashed water on her face, removing her make-up to reveal the dull pallor of her skin. She tore her gaze away, focussing instead upon brushing her teeth, trying to think of anything but their situation, trying to just for a few seconds relieve her mind from the worry that constantly plagued her. She knew it was impossible.

She re-entered the bedroom. Though she couldn't see her husband's face in the darkness, she could imagine it; his features would be relaxed, holding none of the worry that hers did; for she had noticed a similar weariness adorning his face as her own. The situation was affecting him, though she suspected it had more to do with her reaction than any worry of the situation itself.

She settled herself beside him, wanting to reach out and touch him, needing to feel some solid presence of what she could not see. But she stopped herself. She couldn't risk waking him. He needed the sleep, she couldn't contribute anymore to his tiredness.

He turned then, startling her. She was so sure he had been asleep. The thought that she woke him added new guilt to that already settling heavily on her heart. "I'm sorry." She whispered. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"Don't apologise." His voice was thick with sleep. He slipped his arms around her, pulling her gently against his chest.

She smiled sadly, draping one arm around his waist, her hand pressing firmly against his back.


	37. Chapter 37

_A/N: I just want to say a big thanks to everyone who has been kind enough to comment on and read my fics during the past year. Other things had to take priority, but I'm hoping to now get back into writing, and hopefully will be posting more regular updates to my fics._

**OOOOO**

It was with a certain trepidation that Jill entered The Royal the following morning. She collected her files from Lizzie, offering only a brief 'thanks' in response, and made her way a little slower than usual to her office door. Gordon was close behind her, his softer footfalls echoing her clipped ones. She selected the new gleaming key from her key ring and inserted it into the new keyhole. A sharp click prompted her to depress the handle, leaning a little of her weight against the painted wood. She had gone through the same routine thousands of times, but never before had she felt quite so much fear at performing such a simple action. Her husband's hand brushed against her lower back, offering his support as she inched the door open.

A shaky breath was released upon seeing the interior of her office. There was no obvious destruction; everything was as she had left it the previous evening. Still, she stepped slowly into the room, glancing around warily, then going over the contents of the room more thoroughly. She exhaled slowly, leaning against her desk, noting only then the trembling of her hands.

"Okay?"

A nod was all she offered in response, taking a deep breath to steady her breathing before speaking. "I'm just glad we didn't have a repeat of the past couple of mornings." She released a laugh, feeling a little relief spreading through her, releasing some of the nausea in her stomach, and slowing her pulse.

He made a noise of agreement, and reached out to brush his hand down her arm. "Ready for Matron's meeting?"

She nodded with a sigh, grudgingly following him out of her office and into reception. He chose two seats at the back of the room; the chairs already set up that morning by Lizzie to face in the direction of Mr Harper's office. The twenty minutes were undoubtedly going to be immensely uncomfortable for Jill and Gordon, and both were eager to sit where they couldn't be seen and stared at.

Matron had suggested the meeting the night before to stem the building gossip around Jill and Gordon's 'situation' as the older woman had infuriatingly dismissed it as. Though it was more of an order than a suggestion; it was clear that the meeting would go ahead with or without the two doctors' agreement. And so Jill and Gordon had nodded, uttered some brief words and left Matron's office; both wanting to escape the prying eyes and whispered suggestions of the hospital staff.

Reception had filled up rapidly since Jill and Gordon had entered, resulting in almost every chair being occupied. Matron was the last to arrive, sweeping in the very moment the hand on the star-burst clock in reception hit 8:30. "Thank you for your attendance," she said, immediately quieting everyone in the room. "I've heard the gossip. I know the rumours that are going around. And they are just that; rumours. No one knows anything for certain. If we did Doctors Ormerod and Weatherill wouldn't be going through all this. So I want them stopped. It's not helping anyone creating fanciful stories."

Jill shifted in her chair, already hating the meeting, and it was less than a minute in. She was actually hoping some poor unfortunate person would be injured so herself, and preferably Gordon as well, would have to escape to casualty or to the accident site. She hated being the centre of attention at the best of times. But now, with everything aspect of their ordeal being aired in front of the entirety of their colleagues…

Gordon brushed her forearm with the backs of his fingers. The contact, though light, was still felt through the material of her jacket sleeve; it still sent the familiar yet still exciting tingle up her arm. A glance at him told her he was feeling as she was. He shifted in his seat, angling his body so his shoulder settled next to hers. She increased the pressure between their bodies, leaning against him, though not so much as anyone would notice. This simple action was enough to lighten her mood a little. Perhaps the meeting wasn't so bad after all.


End file.
